I folded my arms across my chest. “You say all of that, yet you were horrible to me growing up, Hendrix.”
“Let me make it up to you. You wanna hug it out?” he joked before walking over and pulling me into his arms.
I giggled. “Boy, get your ass off me!”
I only put up a minimal fight before melting into his chest. My heart drummed at a million beats per minute as I tried to steady my breathing.Don’t lose your shit, Cass. Don’t lose your fuckin’ shit,I repeated over and over in my mind.
“But for the record, your ass was never nothin’ nice to me either,” he replied.
“Rightfully, so. You were and still are, an asshole when you wanna be.”
He shrugged his broad shoulders. “I’ll take that.”
I flashed him a gentle smile. “Thank you, Hendrix.”
“For what?”
“For checking on me and delivering me from my self-pitying bullshit.”
“I figured you delivered me from mine, so I should at least return the favor. That nigga don’t deserve you, so ain’t no need in wasting another tear on ‘em.”
“On period!”
He chuckled. “On period. So, what you about to do? Go to sleep?”
I shook my head. “I was actually thinking about taking a walk on the beach. You know, to clear my head.”
“You want some company? I could kick it with you if you not tired of me already.”
The remaining liquor in my system made me nod with a quickness. “Sure.”
My misery had acquired his company, and I was in no way ready to let go. Never in my wildest dreams would I have pictured myself walking on the beach at two o’clock in the morning and revealing my demons to someone I usually loathed on any given day. Emotionally, I was spiraling out of control, and I had no way of stopping it. And yet,there I was, staring into his Hennessy brown eyes as he listened to me talk about my shitty love life. The depths of his waves shimmered underneath the yellow moonlight. I couldn’t help but stare at him because he was justthatfine.
“You know, I thought this week was going to be a bust, but uh, I…I’ll admit, I’m enjoying my time here…with you,” I told him.
“You not so bad yourself once I was able to knock that glacier-sized chip off your shoulder.”
I frowned. “I didn’t have a—" He cut his eyes at me, silently calling me out on my bullshit. “Okay, fine. Yes. I had a big ass chip on my shoulder, but now you know why. You know I didn’t even have the balls to tell Lauryn the truth at first? I just told her today and told everybody else that he up and left with no explanation because in some sick, twisted ass way, I wish that’s what would’ve really happened.”
“Why?”
“Honestly?” I asked.
“That’s the only way I want you to give it to me.”
“I can’t take the embarrassment and everybody forming their opinions and feeling sorry for me. I’m not a charity case, you know?”
He bobbed his head. “I get it. Trust me, I do.”
“It’s just, when I love, I love hard. And it always bites me in the ass. It may not be right away, but it always does.”
“There’s nothing wrong with loving hard. That’s what you supposed to do.”
“I’ve never had a problem falling in love, I just don’t need a nigga pretending that he give a fuck about me or my well-being when he don’t. And because of that right there, there are a lot of people and things that’ll never get a second of my time again, him included.”
“I’ma let you in on a little secret. Niggas don’t fuckin’ abandon the heart of someone they truly love, okay? They only abandon the people they were using.”
I swallowed hard. His words hit me like a fuckin’ Mack truck. “Damn,” I mumbled, choking back tears. “I’m a complicated ass puzzle. I’m aware that I’m probably missing a few pieces that willnever be found, too. Sometimes, I just think maybe I’m better off by myself.”
