“Thank you,” I whisper, just loud enough for them all to hear me. “I am a lucky woman to have all of you.”
Mila stands, walks over to her bag, and returns with a box. “I almost forgot, the orders from the passion party came in.” She hands the box to me with a smile. “Which means, not only do you have us, but you also have a vibrator now. No man required.”
I manage a wan smile. I know she is simply trying to bring some levity to the situation. But the sad truth is, I cannot go back to my previous way of living. I now know how it feels to be connected with someone on an intimate level. I cannot ever forget how complete that made me feel.
Just as I cannot shake the belief that without Wyatt, I will never feel that way again.
Chapter twenty-three
Wyatt
“Fuck, I hate Toronto,” I gripe on the phone to Jacob as I push my way through the crowded airport to the check in counter. I’m exhausted and grumpy. And every little thing is pissing me off.
“That’s funny, I remember a time where you thought you might move there permanently. What’s changed?”
“Nothing. I just don’t see the appeal of a city packed full of people anymore.”
“Uh huh, let me guess. Small town life got to you, didn’t it. What’s her name?”
I mutter a curse under my breath as I dodge a couple of people standing in the middle of my path, staring at their phones. “It doesn’t matter.”
“Oh, I think it does, my friend. Because something’s got you in a god-awful mood, and I’m guessing it’s a woman.”
“Can’t I just be in a bad mood? Not all of us are freshly home from several weeks lazing around on a beach surrounded by sun, sand, and beautiful women.”
“And whose fault is that?” Jacob fires back. “I told you to come and join me, but you decided to stay up there.”
I finally make my way to the lineup for check in and come to a stop. “You know I had to deal with the store opening.”
“Yeah, but after that? Why did you stay?”
I don’t answer right away. Even though the answer is simple. Paige.
“Look, Wyatt, what are you doing with yourself?
“Well, right now, I’m waiting to get on a plane back to Vancouver, listening to my best friend go all philosophical on me.”
“Be serious. What would Ryder think if he saw you right now?”
He’d be pissed. “Point taken. But what exactly am I meant to do?” I shuffle forward.
“You’re meant to stop being such a goddamn martyr for once.”
Jacob’s words have the effect I’m sure he intended. My initial reaction is anger, but it’s swiftly eclipsed by remorse.
“Look, man, I don’t wanna be the asshole who gives you shit about your dead brother, but I’m gonna have to. You’re living his life, not yours, and if he were here right now, he would tell you to stop being such a fucking idiot. It’s not gonna bring him back, you know that. So why are you making yourself miserable all the goddamn time?”
It’s not the first time Jacob has tried to say this to me, and in the past, I’ve always dismissed it. But that was before I had a taste of what my life could be.
The line moves forward, and I’m next, giving me the perfect excuse to end a conversation that is making me face up to things I don’t know if I’m ready to deal with. “I gotta go, Jacob. I’ll talk to you when I land. We’ll grab drinks tomorrow or something.”
“Will you at least think about what I said? Whoever she is, I bet she’s worth it.”
“You have no idea.”
I used to like my apartment. The view over English Bay, the open floor plan, clean lines, and simplistic design. It was perfectly fine as a place to return at the end of a day. Now it feels cold and empty. It takes all of twenty minutes to unpack my bag from Toronto and toss a load of clothes into the laundry. Then I find myself at a loss.
If I were still in Dogwood Cove, I’d probably head out for a hike, or go over to Pages to visit Paige. Hell, maybe I’d be at her house cooking dinner or doing some other mundane, yet perfectly peaceful task. I never thought I would be one to enjoy domesticity, especially not with another person. But with Paige, I did.
