Penelope is already on her phone.
“Should we split into two teams?” Mila offers, leaning forward, lit up. “Half good angels, half bad angels?”
Mara hits her own knee. “Yes.Yes, yes, yes. Pen — what color did you buy?”
“White,” Penelope says. “Obviously.”
Lucy smiles softly. “I could be white.”
Mila turns to Mara. “Black or red for the bad ones?”
Mara considers. She looks at Gianna. “G, what are you? Are you good or bad?”
Gianna squints at me. “You don’t look like you’d be on the bad team, honestly, Melly. It’s the eyes.”
Mara nods. “It’s your eyes, girl. You’re a good angel.”
Gianna continues, “So I’ll be bad. Unless you want to be bad?”
Mila pats my knee with a sort of bossy fondness. “She’s definitely innocent. She should be white.”
“Yeah,” I say, laughing. “Yeah, white. I’d love to be a white angel.”
Gianna grins at Mila and Mara. “Let’s do black.”
The three of them nod, in unison, like a tiny secret coven.
Penelope tosses her phone underhand to Mara, who catches it. Mara’s eyes glitter when she sees the outfit on the screen. She shows it to Gianna and Lucy first, and Gianna lets out a low, impressed sigh. Lucy actually grins. Then Mara turns the phone toward me and Mila.
“We are going to look so good,” she says, slow and dangerous, “that hockey team is not going to know what hit them.”
The whole room cheers.
And I —
I laugh along.
I laugh, and I nod, and I smile at exactly the right moments. I clutch my flask of water with both hands.
Because the hockey team — the hockey team includes Blue Golding, who cannot stand being in the same room as me. He will think I dressed up for him. Oh, God, I can’t have that. I imagine myself in that costume at his house, and I almost melt into a puddle of nothingness. Now, I’m not so sure having this many friends is a good thing. Gianna’s brother is the captain of the Wolves for crying out loud. I never intended to come to Camden and be this close to Blue. It all seems intentional, and I hate it.
Then I remember.
I have Halloween plans with Chase.
The realization arrives like the sound of a glass tipping off a counter — first the slow, then the shatter.
I have Halloween plans with Chase.
We made them in August. He has a buddy whose roommate is throwing something. He bought a stupid costume. It’s already hanging in his closet in his bedroom. How did I forget about this? Is Chase so far gone in my mind that I can’t remember plans I made with him? Oh, this is bad. This is so bad.
I don’t bring it up, but I stay quiet for the rest of the time. And then shortly after –– me, Mila, and Penelope are saying goodnight and walking out onto the sidewalk. We start walking in the same direction, but up ahead, Mila will need to take a left instead of a right. It’s cold now. I can see our breath in front of us.
“What’s wrong?” Mila asks right away.
She has known me too long.
I huff as I push my hands deeper into the pockets of my jacket. I whisper, “I have Halloween plans with Chase.”
