“Sorry,” he says, turning the screen toward me. “Proud dad moment.”
It’s a little girl.
Maybe four. Maybe five.
She’s missing one front tooth. Smiling so hard her eyes are nearly closed. One arm thrown around his neck.
Something inside me caves in.
The bar noise fades. The music dulls. The lights blur.
All I can see is Ivy.
All I can see is Nathan on his floor, surrounded by pictures and maps and years of not knowing.
All I can think is,I still haven’t gotten through to him.
Something twists beneath my ribs. Guilt rushes in so fast, it makes me dizzy.
“She’s beautiful,” I manage.
He grins. “Thanks. She’s my whole world.”
I nod, but I’m not really here anymore.
I’m thinking about a man who hasn’t held his daughter in years.
I’m thinking about a message that hasn’t gone through. I’m thinking about time. And how much of it is already gone.
“I’m sorry,” I say suddenly, standing. “I have to go.”
He blinks. “Did I say something wrong?”
“No,” I say, already backing away. “You didn’t. I just— I need to go.”
I find Ashton near the bathroom. She takes one look at my face and doesn’t argue. We leave.
Later, alone in my dark apartment, the dull buzz from the drinks is still in my veins when I open my email. Did he see it? Did he read it? My heart starts racing as I scan the inbox. And then I see it.
Delivery Status Notification (Failure).
The email never reached him.
I try again. Nothing.
Then I check his contact. Blocked.
Everywhere. The word lands like a verdict.
My vision blurs. Rage and heartbreak crash together in my chest. I throw my phone. It hits the wall, missing Dr. Doom by inches.
I collapse onto the bed and stare at the ceiling. Hopeless. Heartbroken.
Lost.
Chapter 42
Ella
