“Not at all.” He answers before setting his glass on the table.
I do the same and move closer to him. Right now, I need to let him know I’m one hundred percent on board. There’s no doubt in my mind that we probably shouldn’t do this. But damn it. Both of us are grown and can get what we want.
Before he can make the first move, I do. My arms are around his neck and my lips crash into his. He’s the only one I feel safe enough to take what I want and not feel bad about it. Time and time again he’s shown me what it’s like to be taken care of and be put first.
His fingers are rough against my hips as he slides me onto his lap, closing any distance between us. His hands slide to my butt as he pulls me closer still and I can feel him stiff below me. I guess it didn’t take as much coaxing as I thought it would. I’m not complaining, though.
Before I can do anything else, Parker pulls away. “Hold on.”
“D-did I do something wrong?” Fear courses through me. I’m so dumb. It was a horrible idea to try anything. How embarrassing.
“Not at all. But you deserve more than getting fucked on a couch.”
“Oh.”
He makes sure I have a tight grip on him before he stands and carries me down the hall to his bedroom. I wouldn’t have minded staying on the sofa, but the bed is probably much more comfortable.
It’s pitch black in his room and he switches on a small lamp beside his bed as he sets me on the bed. It’s not bright, but adds a soft glow. “Is this better?”
“Yeah.” It almost feels romantic. I don’t want to voice it because I worry it’ll break the mood.
He pulls his shirt over his head and throws it behind him. It takes him a few seconds to remove his jeans and he’s standing in front of me in nothing but his boxers. I want to run my fingers along the ridges in his abs.
He reaches forward to lift the bottom of my shirt, but I’ve already beat him to it. I don’t want to give myself a chance to second guess this. Or think about all the ways it could ruin everything.
As soon as my shirt is off, he undoes the button of my shorts, and the zipper is loud in the quiet room as he slides it down. I lean on my hands and lift my hips for him to pull them off. At least I remembered to wear cute underwear today…just in case.
Parker gets down on his knees and slides his hands up my legs. A trail of electricity buzzes along my skin. I knew I didn’t imagine the sparks last time. His fingers grip the sides of my panties and he slides them down.
“If at any point you want me to stop, please tell me.” He words are a whisper in the quiet house.
“Okay.” What else am I supposed to say? I don’t want him to stop.
His lips move along my calves, then my thighs, until he’s fully between my legs and his tongue caresses my clit. I relish the feel of his slow teasing. Most of the guys I’ve been with skip this part entirely. They want me to give them head, but never reciprocate.
It’s nice to be put first. Something I’m not used to. His fingers grip my thighs as I squirm beneath him. His slips one finger into me, pumping in and out to coax out my release. It doesn’t take long. I haven’t been with anyone since I was with him.
Even after that night, I knew I was a goner. There’s nobody who can compare to him. And it’s not about the sex. Not entirely. It’s everything about him. His personality and the ability to make me laugh. Not many people can do that.
He kisses along my torso toward my mouth. When our lips meet, I can taste myself. I try to push him away. To return the favor.
He stops long enough to whisper. “Tonight is all about you.” He reaches behind him and opens a drawer. Within seconds he has what he was reaching for and a package is being opened above my head.
I could interrupt him. Say something funny, but I don’t want to break this moment. Parker is in control tonight, and I’m going with the flow.
The one thing I do is help him slide the condom over his length and take pleasure in the moan that escapes his lips. He slides into me and just like the last time we were together, we are in perfect harmony. Our bodies fit together like puzzle pieces, and if the thought of giving myself over to someone didn’t terrify me, I know we could be forever.
It’s that thought that has me pulling him closer and hiding my face in his shoulder as we rock back and forth together. Taking pleasure in this moment, right now. It might be the last time, or one of many. I can’t think too much on it. Not when we’re together based on a lie.
Parker picks up speed and his thumb is circling my clit. I see fireworks and bite back all the things I want to say but can’t. He follows soon after and wraps me in his arms as he lies down beside me.
I need to clean up, but for now, I’ll soak up being embraced by him. Feeling like for the first time I’m someone’s first choice without them needing anything from me.
Seventeen
Parker
Jasmin in my arms when I wake up is my new favorite thing. Last night was a bad idea. We both know that. But we are two consenting adults. We know the risks of blurring the lines between what’s real and fake. At least, I hope we do.
