‘Swallow it all down, mate.’
‘Aw, you’re a little boy, Gallagher!’ Nelson scrunched up his napkin and lobbed it at Colin. ‘A few manners in front of the lady!’
I gave up and stopped the footage, letting my hand drop.
‘She’s no lady. She spent years on the women’s team with my sister, who is even worse than me.’
I didn’t even know where to start. ‘No one of any gender will be interested in your cock and balls,’ I grumbled. ‘Plus, I can be a ladyanda rider.’
His grin kicked me in the shins, as though I’d told him exactly what he wanted to hear. ‘Glad you remember the glory days after all,’ he quipped and tweaked my ear, brushing his fingers over the three silver studs in the lobe today. ‘Speaking of which, it’s rest day tomorrow, which means you and I have a date with a bike.’
My reluctant smile was wiped right off my face again. Why was he pushing this? That line I’d drawn under my career was supposed to be thick and black, to protect me from all the disappointment – and that yearning, frustrated part of me thatwantedto get back on, screw my nice, neat future. But Colin kept rubbing at it until it was blurry.
The worst part was that I could see the mountains when I closed my eyes, feel the wind on my cheeks. I was fighting myself and I couldn’t let him guess how torn I was.
‘I haven’t agreed to anything,’ I said warily. ‘I don’t have any kit.’
‘Not an excuse. You’re on a training camp. Kit abounds.’ His eyes drifted to my collarbone, a little lower, before snapping back up to my face. I imagined his neck glowed a little pink.
‘If you’re thinking that my boobs are so small I’d fit into men’s kit, you can fuck right off.’
I was not prepared for the view of him biting his lip in response. He eyeballed me, his throat bobbing as he swallowed. ‘I know how hot you look in a speedsuit, Kubicka.’
My hair stood on end and I was glad of the cheering and wolf whistles from Derek, Nelson and the others at Colin’s blatant – too blatant – attempt to butter me up. He was putting on a show to lighten the mood, that was all. I told myself that anyway.
‘What about shoes? I’m assuming you can’t solvethatproblem by tomorrow? Do they do next-day delivery all the way up here?’ I asked, following him back to the coffee machine, which also moved us out of earshot of the others.
‘You’re assuming I’m not already prepared. We had a deal. You aren’t about to back out, are you?’
‘I agreed to prank you in return and be… friends.’ That sounded better than repeating that I’d agreed to give a little bit of me in return for a little bit of him. ‘You haven’t exactly upheld your side.’
‘What? I’ve been playing your little performing PowerFuel monkey.’
‘Half my footage has been unusable.’ I didn’t mention that the other half was pure brilliance.
‘What more do you want? You’ll have to get in line for your pound of flesh. It’s one of the demands of the Tour.’
His graphic comment piqued my curiosity and created the perfect opportunity to introduce the subject I’d been hesitating over. ‘My supervisor says I need you to sit down for an interview.’
If there’d been a ticking clock in the breakfast room, we would have heard it. Colin’s expression was less than impressed.
‘That doesn’t sound like a fifteen-second viral video,’ he finally said. ‘I don’t think I can be entertaining in long format. I’d run out of rude jokes.’
He was playing a role. He couldn’t really believe I didn’t see through him, could he?
‘It wouldn’t be like an interview with a sports journalist. It’s for background, for sound bites we can use over the footage I’ve taken; what drives you – that sort of thing.’
His expression was still notably blank. ‘What drives me,’ he echoed with a twitch in his jaw. ‘Who gives a shit about that?’
A little bit of me for a little bit of him. I should leave him alone. God knows, with his upbringing he had to have his share of hang-ups about the sport and he was right: no one needed to see him bleed. But I felt close to understanding something; maybe there was a misguided urge to help him.
‘Colin, if it bothers you—’
‘Nah, why would it bother me?’ He broke out another smile, that roller blind crashing down over his expression. How many times had I seen that now? ‘Not as much as you learning to ride a bike again, anyway.’
Predictably, my pride rose to that one. ‘I don’t need to go back to training wheels.’
‘If you say so.’
