1
Kia
The nausea hits before I’m fully awake.
One second I’m under the covers in my brother’s guest room, staring at the washed-out light seeping around the curtains, and the next my stomach cramps so hard it steals my breath.
“Oh crap,” I whisper, rolling onto my side.
My feet barely find the carpet before I’m rushing into the bathroom. The tile is cold against my bare feet as I drop to my knees, flip the seat up, and?—
My body takes over.
The vomiting is harsh and relentless, scraping up everything inside me until I’m shaking. My eyes sting and my throat burns. Even when there’s nothing left, my stomach continues to convulse.
Almost every morning for the past month has started out this way.
If I’m lucky, it’ll pass quickly. Sometimes it drags on for hours, leaving me to feel hollow and wrung out, stranded on the bathroom floor with fear buzzing beneath my skin.
I sag forward, my forehead resting against the cool porcelain as my hair hangs in damp strands along my temples. With my eyes closed, I breathe through my nose, trying to get my body under control.
My guess is that I’m around ten weeks pregnant.
Possibly eleven.
I stopped counting because numbers make it real, and real turns into panic faster than I’m able to manage. A bitter taste coats my tongue as I swallow and blink until the room stops swimming. It’s hard not to feel like the universe is punishing me for being naïve and trusting the wrong man.
The sound of footsteps padding down the hallway outside my room is enough to turn my blood to ice.
Please, please, please don’t let it be my brother.
I’m not ready to tell Oliver yet. I’ve spent weeks rehearsing the conversation in my head, testing different versions of the truth, but none explain how I let this happen. Or how I ignored all the warning signs when I handed my heart over to a guy who didn’t deserve it.
Here’s what I know: words aren’t going to fix this. But a plan will. Unfortunately, I’m still trying to figure that part out. So, until I have something concrete in place, I’m keeping this secret to myself.
The footsteps pause outside the bathroom door.
Shit.
My muscles brace on instinct.
“Kia?” Rina’s voice drifts through the door. A second later, she steps inside. Her expression fills with sympathy when she finds me on the floor. “Oh, honey.”
The relief that crashes over me is enough to make my shoulders sag. I hadn’t realized how tense I’d become until this moment. Rina grabs a clean washcloth from the counter and runs it under the water before crouching beside me. The gentle way she presses it to my forehead has my eyes burning all over again.
Even though we haven’t known each other long, we’ve bonded over our unexpected pregnancies. The shared understanding, unspoken fears, along with the strange mix of joy and terror that comes when you realize your life is about to change whether you’re ready or not.
Only, she has Oliver.
My brother is protective, loyal, and all in when it comes to this woman.
And I have?—
I squeeze my eyes shut and shove the thought away before it can finish forming.
I have myself.
That’s it. And for now, it’ll have to be enough.
