“If I ask it of you, will you leave me behind?”
He started to refuse, but she rolled over to face him. “Raine, I don’t want you to watch me die. I want you to remember me in another way. Mayhap the way we were yesterday, when you let me race you on the ice.” Her blue eyes stared into his with regret, and she reached up to touch his cheek. “Be my friend and allow me that mercy.”
“No.” He would never leave her behind to die. “That, I will not do.”
“Stubborn man,” she whispered. “Why not?”
“Because I had to leave my sisters, and it was not my choice. They were helpless, and are now prisoners of the king. I won’t turn my back on a woman again.” His voice came out sharper than he’d intended, but he would never abandon her. It struck him hard to realize that he would miss her, too. This fragile woman had somehow entwined herself within him.
“Then...if I do not survive the rest of this journey, promise me that you’ll stay until I breathe my last breath.”
He didn’t even want to imagine it. “You won’t die alone,” was all he could manage.
She smiled then and kept her hand upon his cheek. “I will always be grateful that you saved me from a marriage to Rory Ó Connor.”
Her palm was a brand upon his blackened soul. “I am sorry,” he said. Sorry for what he had done and for what he still had to do. But she misunderstood him, believing he was apologizing because of her illness.
“Don’t be.” She let her fingers trail down his arm. “I have enjoyed these days with you. I am glad you changed your mind about escorting me to the west. I only hope I can finish the journey.”
Her words humbled him, yet the idea of this woman dying was a blow he didn’t want to face. Her smile, her passion—she captivated him in a way no woman ever had. If she died, he would mourn the loss of her.
Instead, he held her tightly and tried not to think of it.
Chapter Ten
Carice awakened, feeling warm and beloved. She was lying in Raine’s arms, and it gave her a sense of peace.I don’t want him to go,she thought. But, of course, that wasn’t realistic. He had to return to his commander, and after that, she wouldn’t see him again. The emptiness at that knowledge struck her hard. She had grown accustomed to having him at her side, and it had driven back her loneliness.
Her stomach ached from hunger, but the pains from earlier had abated. Though she was still weak, she thought she might be able to eat a little. Perhaps dried fruit or meat.
She turned to study Raine in sleep. The bristle of his beard lined his cheeks, and the worry upon his face had softened. For once, he appeared contented, and she found herself longing to kiss him.
Truthfully, she wanted more than that. She wanted to run her hands over his hardened chest, to bring his mouth to her own skin. She wanted to know what it was to love this man and to have him love her in return.
Dear God, her time remaining was slipping away so fast. She had thought she’d accepted it, only to realize that Raine gave her a reason to fight harder. He gave her a reason to live.
And whether or not it was right, she wanted him.
Softly, she touched his hair, smoothing it back from his brow. His green eyes opened, and the worried expression returned to his gaze.
“How do you feel?” he asked.
Carice gave a nod that she was all right, but instead, she ran her hand to the back of his neck. She needed to touch him, needed to feel his strength. “I am better today. But I am feeling a little hungry.” She almost hated to voice it to him, knowing he would have to leave to fetch her food.
“I’ll bring you something to eat.” Gently, he moved away from her, tucking the furs around her before he left the shelter of the dolmen.
The moment he left, she forced herself to straighten and come out of the shelter. The fire Raine had built hours ago had burned down to low embers, so she found a few dry branches to coax it back to life. Carice stretched her stiff limbs, and when the cold wind struck her, she reached for her cloak. A new layer of snow had fallen, and she smiled at the frosted branches within the woods.
Raine brought her some dried venison from their supplies, and she ate, struggling to chew the hardened meat. But the nourishment eased her, and he gave her even more when she had finished.
It was noon, and the sun was directly over them. She was grateful for it, but it only reminded her that they still had along journey ahead. This landscape was unfamiliar to her, but she sensed that they were not terribly far from the sea. Which was strange, since they had a greater distance to ride. Had they traveled farther than she’d remembered?
“We should go,” she told Raine. Aye, she was weary, but she knew the necessity of moving forward.
“I don’t know if we should,” he hedged. “You were very ill last night, and it might be better if we wait until nightfall.”
“My stomach doesn’t hurt quite as much right now,” she admitted. “I’d rather travel while I’m feeling better.”
He didn’t appear convinced but helped her onto the mare before mounting his own horse. Carice gripped the reins and felt lightheaded for a moment before she steadied herself. Raine drew his horse alongside hers. “You must let me know if you’re feeling unwell and need to stop.”
