“I looked it up, you know? Whole ass Reddit threads about how some kinks come from trauma or whatever. Something you needed and didn’t get, or something that scared you, or—But nah, man. There’szero reasonwhy I like being a human fuck-doll.”
“I spent a while trying to figure out my thing,” I continue. “Like what’s the root of it, you know? And I couldn’t find one. First I thought it was because I didn’t have to think, but that’s not it. I thinkmorein doll mode. My brain’s just one big billboard saying ’holy fuck this rules’the entire time.”
Reid’s quiet for a second before asking, “So what’s the reason?”
I shrug.
“Dunno. Maybe I just like handing my body to someone else. No trauma, though. Turns out you don’t need to be broken to have a kink. And you don’t owe anyone an explanation for what makes you throb, man.” I grin up at him. “If that makes me a freak, hell yeah. I’m chill with it now.”
I made peace with being like this. I thought it would scare the hell out of me, but it doesn’t. I don’t even know why I say the next part, but the words just slip out.
“I think that’s why my relationships never worked. Like, deep down I knew what I actually liked. And it’s fucking—” I laugh, low and steamless, looking back at him. “I’m fine with this, Iam,but who the hell’s gonna love and accept someone who wants to be a literal human fleshlight?”
Reid looks at me like I’m the dumbest motherfucker on the planet. His dark eyes scan my face before he opens his mouth—
“I would.”
The voice comes from right behind me. I twist around to see Miles leaning against the bathroom doorway with his arms crossed over his chest.
“What?”
He pushes off the doorframe and crouches next to the tub, resting his elbows on the porcelain edge. His fingers skim the surface of the water, hovering just above my knee.
“You heard me.”
Yeah, I heard him clear as day. I just can’t wrap my head around the words.
“I’d love you, if you let me. Like, full-on simp mode. Take you on dates. Hold your hand in public. Do whatever you want. The whole nine.”
A nervous laugh slips out of my throat.
“Are you high right now?”
“Nah.” He flicks a small splash of water at my chest. “Stone-cold sober. And yeah, I don’t care if you’re a freak.” His thumb rubs light circles on my knee, right where USE ME was written earlier. “Freak’s not a bad thing.”
“How can you even say that when I literally get off on being treated like a cocksleeve, man?”
“You’renota fucking cocksleeve, Kit. You’re a guy with a kink. It doesn’t define who you are as a person.”
Fuck.
Wait. Why are my eyes burning?
“I would too,” Reid says, quietly.
I twist my neck back to gape at him.
“I would too,” he repeats more firmly.
“I already love you,” Miles says, and I look back at him. “Doll kink and all.”
“I already do too,” Reid cuts in, and there’s a rare streak of desperation in his tone. “I’ve been loving you for months.”
“I’ve been in love with you for a whole year,” Miles counters, dropping the final bomb without blinking.
I shake my head, because I need my thoughts in order right now. What the hell isgoing on?
“You told me that youweren’tin love with me.”
