Come on, Sarah, get a grip.
She needed to be stronger, get through this final push and then she would come out the other side, free.
Free from the feeling of being abandoned.
Free to be with Richard until she had no need for him.
And free to live in her perfect home. Where no one could make her feel unsafe, or unwanted ever again.
CHAPTER FIFTY-THREE
Louisa stared through the kitchen window. Sarah was sitting in the garden, Daisy at her feet. She wondered whether to join them, decided against it. She didn’t feel as if she fitted here now, especially since the episode with Richard a few days ago. She didn’t know who to trust any more.
From the very first day she’d seen her sister, she’d been protective of her. She’d been five years old and Sarah had seemed like a living doll. Of course, Mum let Louisa do as much as she could to help with looking after her, and at that age, she’d been happy to oblige.
She remembered rushing home from school when she was seven. Sarah’s face would light up, her arms outstretched towards her. Louisa couldn’t wait to give her a cuddle. They had such a special bond. It was something she couldn’t hate her mum for. The rest of their childhood she could, but not that.
When she was eight and Sarah had been three, Dad had left. He’d hardly been around for them in the sense of being a parent anyway. He’d spent most of his life either in the pub or on short-stay prison sentences. He fancied himself as something of a thief, but he got caught too many times. So when he left, for the first week or so they never even noticed. The first inkling was when the food started to run out and they had to go to Nana’s for their tea.
Their mum got a job for a while then. She was nice at times, when she was off the booze. But it was when she started bringing home men that it became a problem for them. That was when the five-year age gap between them became more relevant. Louisa was old enough for the men to gawp at but equally she could hold her own. She tried to look after Sarah but was sure there were things her sister hadn’t told her. Sarah had become withdrawn a few months before Louisa had left for Mapleton. She’d put it down to teenage hormones and the fact she was leaving, but she should have taken more notice about what was happening. It was probably then that Sarah had lost faith in her.
How Louisa wished she could turn back the clock to when they would have been happy. To when they wouldn’t have become distant. To a time when there had been no blame, just fun and laughter and looking out for one another.
Sarah might think she knew Richard, but she didn’t know all of him. And it would also depend on the sidehe wanted to let her see. When Louisa first met him, he’d been such a charmer. But she hadn’t realised what was happening until it was too late. Richard controlled her. He didn’t want what was best for her, like he led her to believe. Richard wanted her for his own entertainment. She perhaps wouldn’t have minded so much if he hadn’t been so cruel.
Over dinner with Richard, she tried to act as if everything was fine. But the first plate he handed to her slipped from her grip and clattered to the table.
‘You’re such a clumsy cow,’ he muttered, leaning back in his chair with no attempt to help her.
‘Sorry,’ she said. ‘I lost my grip for a moment.’
‘I suppose you’re going to blame that on your illness.’ He rolled his eyes.
‘Well, it could be. I often drop things and it is a condition.’
‘Of what?’
‘ME.’
‘You don’t have ME.’
‘Well, it hasn’t been diagnosed yet, but Doctor Alliott said?—’
‘Oh, what does he know?’ Richard’s tone was snidey.
‘You think he’d lie to me? He wouldn’t.’
‘He never said you had ME. You’re making it up. Because you’re a liar. You’re a thief too. Don’t think I haven’t noticed money going missing.’
‘What?’ Louisa frowned. Even though she plannedto take some with her when she left, she hadn’t dared go into the box where he kept a few hundred pounds.
Richard grabbed her wrist and gripped hard. ‘You’ve been stealing from me. As if I don’t give you enough.’
‘No, I haven’t! Let go, you’re hurting me!’
‘There’s two hundred pounds missing. The least you could have done was take a little at a time.’
‘I haven’t taken anything. It…it could have been Sarah.’
