Billy paused a beat before she said, "You're not the same person you were when you were her age."
"When I think back on that night…nobody turned up and I was left just sitting in a bar by myself…and that man wouldn't leave me alone, then there you were…striding in like a woman possessed, pulling me up out of my seat and dragging me off to a club you knew."
"What else was I going to do with my girlfriend on her birthday?"
Rosa turned to face her, reached up, and cupped her cheek. "You saved me that night. My knight in shining armour…well, waistcoat and slacks, but equally dashing. I think that I've punished myself all these years that I couldn't do the same for you when you needed me."
"Rosa, that's—"
"Shh, let me speak." Rosa looked down at their hands holding each other. "I let you walk away because it was the easier of the choices I had, but I've never forgiven myself for it. Instead…I blamed you for making me have to make the choice."
Billy's voice broke. Tears filled her eyes. "Thank you, for acknowledging that… I don't hold any resentment and there is nothing for you to forgive yourself for. We both made decisions at the time that maybe now, with hindsight and experience, we wouldn't make again."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't be who you needed me to be."
Chapter thirty-four
Once Imogen had slid into her sleeping bag, she huffed, "I really thought they'd be all loved up."
"Yeah… Was watching them…they barely spoke to one another. Maybe they just don't like each other like that anymore?" Janka said.
They were top and tailing, with Robbie and Imogen's heads up one end, and Janka between them with her head at the other end of the bed. All of them were sitting up, like three bright red caterpillars with arms.
"I guess…" Imogen said. She huffed again. "But I just know if they were to—"
"Spend time together?" Robbie gave her a look.
"Yeah, I know, they just did that." Imogen sighed.
Robbie laughed. "Shame Billy doesn't drink…we could have plied them with wine and left them to it."
"Yeah, she's all zen about stuff like that. Her body is a temple or something," Imogen explained, then shrugged. "I guess it works, though."
"Yeah, she's fit," Janka said absently. The other two stared at her. "I mean…you know, for a mum."
"Uh huh…are you perving on Immy's mother?" Robbie teased.
"No," Janka said, before laughing. "I mean, maybe…she's hot."
"Eww, that's so grim." Imogen laughed and threw a pillow at her friend.
"Nah, you have to admit, C-F, you got good genes from them two."
Imogen narrowed her eyes at Robbie. "You do know how IVF works, right? I got genes from Rosa."
"And yet, you look more like Billy. It's uncanny."
"Did you ever think about who your dad is?" Janka asked.
"Nope. I mean, I don't really think I have a ‘dad’. There's a man out there who provided a service, and that's all. My mum's gynaecologist has had more impact in our lives than the bloke who donated some sperm."
Robbie nodded. "True." They sat in silence for a pause before Robbie said, "So, are we giving up on trying to get them together?"
"Maybe… If it didn't happen now, I can't see it happening when we get back. They don't have any reason to see each other unless it's about me."
"It was worth a try, Immy," Janka said.
"Yeah, and we've still got tomorrow to ski before we head home… Who knows what might happen?" Robbie encouraged.
