?Half of my life spent as literal prey, a weak and worthless being choosing not to fight back. Bracing in the face of amonster, which quite literally means Iknewthe hit was coming and still chose to do nothing about it. I was waiting for it.
?Being a child means nothing when I still had my power at my fingertips. I could have burned his soul to ash the moment I looked into those dark, frozen eyes of his.
?At least, that’s what I had thought for a very long time.
?Then the other half of my life I spent in a brothel. Watching women and men appreciate their sexuality and proving that being submissive does not mean you’re weak. Being a female does not mean you’re weak. Being smaller, more feminine, quieter, a bottom, willing to get on your knees does not mean you’re weak.
?I survived something as a child that no child should ever have to go through. And there are times where I still hate myself for not being able to get myself out of the situation faster, for how I react now because of it, for not being able to fully move on, for not accepting my own preferences when everyone else has. There are times I hate myself because I still brace, but I’m working on that.
?That was the other reason I chose Darian out of any and every other choice. Exposure therapy in a sense.
?Right now, however, trauma no longer pertains to this moment. Not when I know, my body and my soul, that it’s Varian. The devil with red eyes encased in gold. He’s somewhere out of my line of sight, stalking my every move, waiting for the moment I’ll bolt.
?That adrenaline rushes anew along with a heat sparking at my core. A wave of warmth rolling around my lower abdomen.
?His scent gets stronger behind me and I shift my weight the smallest amount, waiting.
?Curling my fingers hidden by the layers of fabric, I feel his exhale hit the right side of my head. His body heat consuming me in a small inferno as his life-smelling scent wraps around me.
?“Bloodsucker,” he murmurs, his voice dripping with such male satisfaction.
?And I smile behind my mask as I step my left foot forward, shift my right foot and hips, and swing my left hand fisted directly into my devil’s jaw.
?The blow held none of my raw magic and it was nowhere near at the strength of what it used to be, but my form was solid and working out this past week while doing my minimized training helps to knock him sideways.
?He stumbles and I take the second I have to bolt.
?Slamming into the door, I twist the knob and yank it open. Only it doesn’t open and a weight presses into my back as hands grip my sides. His body pressing me into the door as I try to twist and jab my elbow into his side.
?It barely does anything to him. His hands like vises around my waist, fingers carefully digging in and that slow burn rolling through me flickers as his warm breath whispers over my ear.
?“Such abrat.” His hips and chest pressing into me from behind until I can’t move anymore. Trapped between him and the door I now realize is paired with aDevil’s Lock. “From day one you’ve given nothing but attitude to me.”
?Fucking asshole.
?He hums. “I could just fuck your asshole.”
?I choke on quite literallynothingas my brain glitches trying to figure out if I heard him correctly. All while something drips down my thigh. I squeeze my legs together but he inhales sharply before his chest vibrates against my back and something hard presses just above my ass.
?“It seems like your needs are not being met, bloodsucker.” I can’t tell if that’s actual jealousy in his tone or if I’m just projecting. In a twisted, lust-riddled way, I hope it’s the former.
?His hand snakes around my front and splays over my lower abdomen, pulling me impossibly closer to him. My mask gets skewed as his nose buries into my hair. His hand inches lower down my front as his left hand tightens to the point where I wonder if there will be bruises on my waist.
?A tiny, tiny voice I’m ignoring for the time being whispers that his marks on me wouldn’t be that bad.
?Every point of contact with him burns with a heat like my fire. A steady warmth igniting nerves I didn’t think I would enjoy feeling again. My head lolls and lips press into the side of my neck in response as I feel two strong fingers curve down and pull. The soft fabric of my dress giving barely any friction as I open my legs for him.
?His lips trace over my neck. “So responsive to my touch.” My head goes fuzzy and my eyes flutter shut as I pant behind my mask. The air hot but I don’t want to move inch incase he chooses to stop.
?God, I hope he doesn’t stop.
?His chest rumbles again as his fingers slowly begin rubbing up and down and up and down, soaking the fabric of my dress with my wetness and that floral cutting scent. The bark and powder of no use now.
?“You’d have to beg me to stop now, little bloodsucker.” His tongue licking my pulse point before his lips suck hard on my neck. It takes me a moment, trying to clear the fog of lust and arousal to realize he was responding to my thought, not my words.
?In the back of my mind I know I need to remember to breathe and concentrate and keep those doors within me shut and locked.
?In the back of my mind I also know I need to remember that I need to get away so I can win this game. But a little indulgence before the actual hunt can’t really hurt. I just need to breathe and control.
