I barely finish the sentence before his heartbeat stutters, then thunders. He’s flush against me in an instant. “Now would be fine.”
I press my palm to his chest, feeling how fast his heart isracing. “I think we have a few pressing matters to handle in the other room first.”
“Fuck Bram,” he growls. “If my mate wants to be bitten, then?—”
“Well, I’m not surewantis the right word,” I cut in gently. Honesty matters, even if it makes me squirm. “I’m still a little terrified it’s going to hurt.” I exhale. “But Liz made me realize something earlier. I already know I don’t foresee life without you. Not since the moment I returned and felt the pull to you. It was like the world had been off center every moment before, and then you entered the cave… Everything clicked into place.”
His hands slide up my ribs, slow and reverent, until they frame my face. His thumbs brush my cheeks like he’s groundingmenow.
“That’s all I need to know, Rowan,” he says softly. “But also, not enough to take this further.”
I blink.
“If you’re afraid,” he continues, voice steady, searching, “or if you feel like this is just the next step you’re supposed to take, then we wait.” His gaze holds mine, unflinching. “This isn’t something we rush. It’s not a box to check or a duty to fulfill. This is our bond. We’re not on anyone’s timeline other than our own. We are all we can control.”
Something in my chest twists, a recognition that opens a box of thoughts I didn’t realize I was hiding.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he adds quietly. “I don’t want you choosing this because it feels inevitable. When we mark each other, when our bond is finally complete, it’s not going to be a scheduled thing. It’s going to happenbecause we both know right in that moment that nothing else can or will stop us.”
I hate how right he is, and hate how I’ve almost ruined this because I understand what he’s seeing in me. What I didn’t even realize I was doing.
Going through the motions.
Trying to be brave. Trying to be ready. Trying to be everything this bond expects me to be.
When what he wants…what he’s been waiting patiently for…is me choosing him without obligation.
Gods, how could I have screwed this up so badly?
You could have maybe waited until tonight, when you were alone, in bed, maybe, Wolf drones.That might have helped.
Traitor.
“I’m sorry, Cade,” I say softly. “It’s not that I’m trying to justget it done. Not even close.” I take one of his hands and press it flat against my chest, right over my heart. “I feel you here. I feel the bond. I know this is where I’m meant to be, right by your side.”
His eyes darken, but he doesn’t interrupt.
“I feel the pull to be the leader your pack deserves,” I continue, words spilling out now that I’ve started. “All of those things, I know they’re real. I know they’re what I want. I just don’t know how I’m supposed to get there yet. I thought this was it.” My throat tightens. “I’m floundering. And maybe making things worse. But I’m trying, Cade. I’m trying to be who I’m supposed to be.”
He leans in, resting his forehead against mine, his breath warm and steady like an anchor. When he smiles, it’s soft and unhurried.
“Easy, mate,” he murmurs. “We have our whole lives to keep becoming who we’re meant to be. There’s no clock ticking down on us.” His thumb brushes my cheek. “I believe you when you say you’re ready. That doesn’t mean the moment has to be now. It’s enough that we’re talking about it. We’re only going to get through this life together if we communicate with one another.”
His gaze flickers with something wry. “I know I sounded more than eager earlier, but that was the beast talking.” His voice drops, gentle and sure. “You’ll only ever have the man.”
If my knees get any weaker, I might actually melt into the floor.
Still, I can’t resist.
“What if,” I say carefully, “I’d like the beast to visit…occasionally?”
His grin spreads slowly and dangerously. “I’m sure we can work something out.”
I laugh, relief bubbling up as I wrap my arms around him and hold on tight. The knot of nerves I’ve been breathing around for hours, maybe even days, finally loosens, unwinding into something warm and steady.
And he’s right. We’re closer now, just from one conversation. On the same page, emotionally, even if the bite doesn’t happen tonight—even if sex doesn’t happen right away—the fact that we’re still moving toward each other instead of around one another feels like more than enough.
When I look up at him again, he’s staring at me like his world spins on my existence alone.
