Maybe Ash was still upset over all the truths Spencer had spilled while drunk the night before, although it wasn’t like him to dwell.
“Nothing,” Ash said, equally quiet. Apparently neither of them wanted to wake the sleeping beauty. “Just … I’ve been taking you for granted, haven’t I?”
Ryder frowned at him. “Have you?” Ryder had never felt that way. Not really. He and Ash had been a part of each other for too long—of course it wasn’t always going to feel new or surprising or whatever.
Ash’s gaze dropped to Spencer’s face, which was covered by his dark hair and barely poking out from the gap in the mattresses. “I’ve never felt like that, you know. That I might drive you away. I’ve never worried about you and me in a tiny cabin.”
“Why the fuck would you?”
Ash met Ryder’s eyes again, his wide mouth twisting into a grin that was uncharacteristically sweet. “I’m just saying. I love you.”
Ryder’s frown deepened. “I know that.”
Ash’s grin shifted into a smirk. “AndIknow I’m lucky to have you. I’ll always know that. No matter how squirrelly I get sometimes.”
“I don’t mind you squirrelly, bright eyes.”
It was true. Ryder never doubted how Ash felt about him—not the core of it. But then again, thereweredisparities in what they needed from each other. There always had been. Ryderknew he exuded a certain amount of calm on the outside, but he had a possessive nature underneath. There was a reason he never minded scenting Ash half to death to cover Ash’s lack of designation. And Ash … Ash liked a certain amount of freedom. He liked to know he was his own man, even if he usually appeared in a duo. And he was mercurial when it came to touch, whereas Ryder was unflaggingly tactile by nature.
Maybe Ryder could see Ash’s point. Those differences could get into someone’s head if he wasn’t careful. Maybe it was worth saying things out loud sometimes.
Ryder swallowed hard. “I’m yours,” he said gruffly. “You know that too.”
“Yeah.” Ash nodded solemnly, even as his eyes danced. “I do know that.” He yawned and grabbed Spencer’s wrist, carefully setting the alpha’s arm aside. “I’m gonna get breakfast burritos. He’ll need one.”
Ryder grunted his agreement, letting his eyes fall closed again. He could hear the rustle of Ash getting dressed, the jingle as he stole Spencer’s car keys, and then the hard sound of the front door slamming.
Ash never had been very good at closing it quietly.
Spencer bolted upright, his leg falling away from Ryder as he blinked stupidly, peering around the room. “Wha?—?”
“Relax.” Ryder pressed a hand to Spencer’s chest, pushing him back down to the bed. “Ash went to get fuel.”
Spencer turned to face him, blinking some more. He had gnarly bedhead and sleepy, red-rimmed eyes, and somehow he still looked immensely fuckable. Another insight into why no one wanted to let him go the morning after.
“Mm. Sleep okay?”
Ryder smirked at him. Trust Spencer to ask that when he was shoved down on the floor between two mattresses. “I slept fine. You feel sick at all?”
“Nah.” Spencer yawned and scratched at his chest, apparently comfortable in his mattress cocoon. “Hardly ever get hangovers. Kick-ass metabolism.” He paused, then shook his head. “Said some dumb shit, though, huh?”
Ryder turned to his side, propping his cheek on his fist. He didn’t miss the way Spencer’s gaze immediately fell to his flexed bicep. “None of it was dumb.”
Spencer shrugged. “Wouldn’t be the first time. What’s Ash getting us?”
Ryder let the change of subject slide. For now. “Burritos. Egg, potatoes, chorizo, cheese, lots of salsa on the side.” He and Ash never changed their breakfast burrito orders.
“Mm.” Spencer smacked his lips. “Shouldn’t, but I will.”
“What’s the deal with that? You and food?” Ryder knew enough to know it wasn’t, like, alarmingly strict—he’d seen Spencer make plenty of exceptions to his diet. But Ryder had a need to know where the borders lay, if only to keep an eye on if or when he might need to worry.
“Oh. I dunno. Like, we could never afford the good shit growing up. It was always junk and fast food, and there was never enough. So it’s, like, nice that I get to decide now. Macros and shit and trying to maximize nutrition, not just eating whatever frozen shit’s on sale.”
“And the fact that you’re ripped as hell?”
“A bonus.” Spencer grinned, trailing a hand down his chest. “I was always scrawny as shit growing up. Now I have something to offer.”
Ryder frowned at him. “You know it’s normal for alphas to be smaller when they’re young, right? Our metabolisms working too fast or something. And you could gain or lose however much, you’d still be sexy. A burrito here and there isn’t going to fuck with that.”
