“I sucked dick once and really liked it.”
My jaw hits the table, and I choke on my drink. I didn’t think he was capable of shocking me anymore. But colour me surprised.
He laughs. “Honestly, you should see your face! It’s no big deal. What’s your secret, Amelie?”
Where to start? I like it when he calls me sis? I loved the time we were all together after the pool at Monty’s, but it left me longing for more? I’m terrified to fuck this up and let people down, that the guys will leave, that Debbie didn’t want me because she saw the same thing in me that Laura did, which is why I was abandoned and beaten? That I deserve everything that’s happened to me and worse?
“Oh, I think you know all of my secrets by now, Kalen.” I force myself to sound glib and laugh it away. Taking a large mouthful of my water, I scan the room and then turn to Sawyer on my left. Anything to stop Kalen probing further.
“Are we going to eat first or do speeches? I’m starving.”
“I’m not sure. Monty and Dirk are running things tonight. If you have a preference though I can speak to them.”
Hmm, which to choose? I’m hungry, but nervous. If we do the welcome and speeches and things after dinner, I may be too nervous to actually eat, but if we do it now, my dad will miss it. He’s still not here. I keep checking the room and every pass my eyes make of his empty seat fills me with disappointment.
I make a decision. “Let’s do it quickly. I want to eat and then try to relax so I can enjoy myself a little.” Besides, my dad will still be here after and staying for a while, so who cares if he misses a speech and an awkward round of applause.
“Good shout. We have an early morning meeting with both boards. Old first, then new.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. Someone needs firing.”
“Oh goodie,” I drone sarcastically. I may not trust the old board, and want them out as quickly as possible, but I don’t relish the idea of firing them. I guess being the boss comes with downsides as well as perks.
Sawyer excuses himself to speak to Monty, and Onyx wastes no time slipping into his seat, his hand going to my thigh once more.
“You look stunning, but knowing you’re wearing that knife right now is just about the sexiest damn thing I ever saw.”
I chuckle and shake my head. “You sound like Baxter.”
“He better not have seen your thighs,” he growls.
“Easy tiger, I just meant you seem to have similar…um tastes to him.”
“I like weapons and beautiful women. The two combined? Heaven.”
“I guess it’s just a little darker than I was expecting.” It’s obviously the wrong thing to say because Onyx’s eyes darken to black and he glowers at me.
“Amelie, you have no idea. I’m still haunted by our histories.”
“What do you mean?"
“Slate. His injuries, his scars. What he had to endure because of me. For me.” He shakes his head, looking anguished. “Then there’s what happened to you. Laura, the gang, the bullies at school. What Slate and I did… I’m still learning to be someone new around you.”
“I don’t want someone new. I want you to be yourself.”
“I don’t think you can handle how deep my darkness goes.”
“I’m friends with Baxter aren’t I?”
“Ninety percent of what he does is just business. I’ll do it for pleasure.”
“I’m not scared of you, Onyx. And I don’t want you holding back on me.”
“Why do you think I always share with Slate? He stops me from going too far. And maybe in the past I wouldn’t have cared that much about hurting the girl I’m with, but with you it’s different.” He hesitates. “You’re everything to me. To them too. Which is why I can’t fuck it up. They’d hate me if we lost you because of what I am.”
“You’re not going to fuck anything up. I trust you.”
