It was the middle of the night when Jamie finally came to their room, and she was waiting for him. She found out what he’d decided on more easilythan she wanted to. Her stomach twisted into a tight knot as she watched him gather weapons, knowing whom those weapons would be used against.
“So you’ve let him goad you into it?” Sheena whispered in a strained voice.
Jamie wouldn’t look at her. “I’ve delayed long enough. It must be done.”
She felt lifeless, dead, except for the pain that wouldn’t stop.
“I’ll no’ be here when you return.” Her words fell out of her, one over the other.
Jamie swung around, his eyes blazing. “You’ll be here, Sheena, or you’ll be wishing you were dead when I find you. And find you I will!”
She caught her breath. On top of everything else, he dared threaten her! Life rushed back into her, and she flew off the chair where she had been sitting for hours, waiting for him.
“Wish I were dead? I wish I were dead now! Aye, dead, instead of married to you!”
“Careful, Sheena—”
“Or what?” she shouted. “You’ll kill me? Better me than my kin!”
Jamie turned away. He had no intention of killing her kin. He’d meant only to talk to Dugald, but he was too angry to say so.
“I’ll no’ be swayed again!” he growled, more to himself than to her.
Sheena ground her fists into her temples in utter frustration. “I hate you for the fool you are, James MacKinnion,” she hissed. “I’m my father’s firstborn! You know how he feels about me. Knowing that, how can you believe he would attack you, leaving me here to suffer for it? Don’t you see?”
“You’ve no’ suffered!”
“But he canna know whether I have or no’. He wouldna risk it! Can you no’ see that?”
If Sheena had been distraught and crying, he might have relented and reassured her. But she was too angry to cry, and he was too angry to acknowledge the sense of what she said. Still, he couldn’t leave her like that. He caught her to him, and his kiss was as furious as their tempers.
And then he shoved her from him, holding her at arm’s length. “I’ll be talking to Dugald first,” Jamie told her curtly. “But I make no promises beyond that.”
He gathered the last of his things and walked out of the room. Then, finally, tears came to Sheena. They racked her, the tears and her desolation.
Chapter 37
The next morning, not even Daphne could bring Sheena out of her despondency. She sat in the hall by the great hearth, seeing nothing of what went on around her. Tortured images were ail she could see, bloodied figures.
It was nearing noon when a voice broke through, a voice she despised. Jessie Martin was sitting across from her, a smugness and a strangeness about her. Sheena had no reason to hate Jessie Martin. Hadn’t she once felt pity for the woman? Still, there was something so distasteful about Jessie.
“Did you say something?” Sheena asked civilly.
“The question was asked if you’re no’ ready to leave yet,” Jessie answered.
“Was it?” Sheena sat back. “Why should I? Do I no’ have everything I could want here, a fine home, a handsome—husband?”
Jessie’s eyes narrowed at the thrust. “I wouldthink your Fergusson pride couldna bear your staying where you’re no’ wanted.”
“And who doesna want me here?” Sheena inquired sweetly. “Jamie certainly does, very much so.”
“But no one else does,” Jessie said tightly. “They may no’ admit it, but ’tis in their thoughts. You’ve changed Jamie. He’s no longer the man he was, and you’re resented for it.”
“Liar!”
“She speaks the truth, Sheena.”
She looked around to see that Black Gawain was standing behind her, and she felt cornered between them, suffocated.
