“I remember how you ate that cookie.” Hayes nods his head thinking about it, then holds his hands to his mouth, miming me destroying a cookie like a Muppet. “A master class in how to enjoy something you love. I found it intoxicating.”
“I didn’t know that.” A dachshund walks over to the fountain and jumps on the ledge, then into the water and quickly out. The dog stops right in front of us and shakes. Small sprinkles cover our feet and we both laugh.
Reflections off the water dance across Hayes’ face and I remember one of the first thoughts I had about him. “I liked that you were able to control your feelings and have this incredible focus. Something that I have never been any good at. I have so much anxiety over so many small things that I handle it by just following whatever shiny object catches my attention. You were able to be calm and centered no matter the situation and that made me feel calmer.”
“I’m glad I was able to make you feel calmer. But you’ve been totally focused on the work this summer.”
“You’re right. Being around you makes it easier for me to…” I listen to the water rippling up out of the fountain and back down to the shallow pool at the base as I think of the exact and honest thing to say. “You make it easier for me to take myself seriously.”
“Wow,” Hayes says, his face showing equal parts surprise and gratitude. “Thank you. That’s a big compliment.”
Bong. Bong. In the distance a church bell rings, followed by a melody of bells playing short staccato phrases that run up and down a major scale. “Where do you think that’s coming from?” I ask.
Hayes looks toward the sky. We are on a hillside, so we have a good view of the city. He points to a steeple that peeks out between a few taller buildings. “There’s only one way to find out,” Hayes says.
We get up from the bench and walk out of the park, letting the ringing bells guide our journey. And once we get there, I know the exact question I want to ask to get this honesty challenge heating up.
Chapter 35
Poznan
Hayes
Beyond the square the streets twist and turn. I won’t let him cheat by looking at his phone so we have to listen for the bells that are still playing their afternoon chimes in order to find our next stop. Brady closes his eyes and turns his head to the side to listen to the sky and figure out our next move. His pretty curls fall over his forehead. I have to fight the urge to touch them and push them back behind his ear.
“Isn’t it great not to have to get to some cooking class or snap a picture at a museum before it closes?” I ask. We hop up to the sidewalk and off the cobblestone.
“Yeah,” Brady says, and by the sound of his voice I can tell he’s cooking up some kind of mischief. But I feel so much less stressed today, even though we are hundreds of miles away from where we should be. I don’t like to get off schedule with anything, but the honesty pact has created an ease that makes the day unfold in ways that seem natural and organic, with a hint of magic.
“This way,” Brady says, and I follow him across a bridge and down a block of short buildings until we arrive at an open square with a church. A sign says something in Polish that I translate roughly as “The Cathedral of Poznan.” Two rectangular brick towers with aqua-patina steeples rise above a center brick rectangle with exposed white beams.
The bells have just stopped playing but I say, “Up there. That’s what we were hearing.” Trees are scattered around the building and we explore the back of the church.
“That’s not what I expected,” Brady says, pointing to the round bulbous roofs that looks like dollops of frosting. The back of the church is so different from the flat facade. We wander around the grounds taking in the details, and then Brady asks, “Are you ready for the next round?”
“Sure.” I knew he was brewing something, but I like this game and I like this town.
“You don’t seem very worried about what I’m going ask,” Brady says, his mischievous tone returning.
“Nope.” Then my gut feels a pang. What if he asks me how I really feel about him? Could he handle the truth? Could I?
We walk a few more steps and then Brady stops. “Tell me the truth,” Brady says, and my stomach tenses. “Did you want to have a three-way with Otto?”
Not the question I was most worried about, but not one that I ever thought he’d ask. “Uhm, well…” I scratch the back of my head, trying to think of what to say. “I was flirting with him to get a rise out of you. I wanted to show you that I’m not the uptight guy I was in college. To show you that I’ve changed. But did I want to have sex with him?”
I tilt my head back and search the sky for the answer. “Otto is a sexy guy. Annoying at times, but sexy. You already know I think you’re sexy as fuck. Would it have been hot to be with both of you at the same time?” He shrugs. “Yeah, why not? It’s something I haven’t done before and something that I might have liked. But…” I shift my weight from one foot to the other. “I don’t know how I would have felt afterwards. I think in the moment it would have been fun. I know you’re amazing in bed and Otto is so intense, but the next morning it would have been weird. What about you? Did you want to have a three-way with me and Otto?”
“Not really. Otto is attractive, I guess, but I’ve already had sex with him and it was fine.” Interesting. He describes sex with Otto as fine. No matter what may have happened between us I’m confident that he wouldn’t use that word to describe sex with me. “But what was really making me consider it was that I thought it would be so hot seeing you get over being nervous about it and just get really into it. You know you can be kind of… reserved.”
“Me?” I use my best falsetto and raise my hand to my chest to grab an invisible strand of pearls in mock offense. I laugh and then he laughs too and kicks back his head. “You’re right, but I’m not as standoffish as I used to be. What do you think?”
Brady doesn’t respond. In fact, he’s silent, and begins walking away from the church back to town. “Brady?” I call after him. “Do you think I’ve changed?” I jog a few steps to keep up. “And remember, we are in Poznan.”
Chapter 36
Poznan
Brady
