“I think my comment really got to him. About him acting like my dad. It was cruel, though.”
“Washe acting like him?”
“Yeah,” I murmur.
She shrugs. “Maybe he needed a wakeup call. It seems like he gets it.”
I give her hand one last squeeze, then turn back to the screen, looking at my camera. I haven’t been this nervous since the first time I went live, at just twenty years old.
I clickstart streamand wait for the comments to flood in. I don’t have to wait long.
A tsunami of hatred pours in.
SlapMyBuns: Cock-hungry slut.
OmegaCosmos: Ugly bitch.
Primus29: Couldn’t get to the top yourself, so had to fuck your way there?
My loyal moderators ban as many as they can—each of these goes against community guidelines—but they can’t keep up. I stare in disbelief at them. So much hatred, and for what?
The chat is moving fast, comments flooding in. Some are supportive.
Ren135: We’re with you, Dakky!
OneWingedBat: We won’t judge you!
Somebody donates fifty dollars and sends a message in all caps.
TreadNorth5: WE LOVE YOU, DAKKY!
I clear my throat, sitting up straight. The words hurt. They cut. They shouldn’t—yet they do. But it’s not like I can crumble or cry, not if I want to salvage my stream. If the trolls see me upset, even for a single frame, they’ll never stop.
“Most of you have seen the news by now,” I say. “It’s true. Jackson Cross and I are dating. It started online, with innocent messages that turned not so innocent.” I swallow, hating the fact they’re out there, our digital intimacy fodder for these people. “I know some of you will never hate me for being human, with human needs. I know some of you will remember where this started, just a small stream in my mom’s basement, doing my best to be noticed, to be different. Brick by brick, I built this channel, thisbrand, if I can use a gross corporate word.”
“The chat’s turning,” Mara mutters from beside me.
She’s right. Having streamed for so long, I’m well practiced at staying focused while monitoring the chat. Hatred still pours in—it’s the internet, after all—but positive messages are coming in quicker. The mix is mind-boggling. I’m sure people weren’t designed for this.
KickinWood: We’re with you, Dakota!
Dr_Mantis_344: Die and rot in hell, slut!
Deckachek: We love you.
MyNameDoesntFI: We hate you.
SHoTGuN7776: You’re just a whore, plain and simple.
SpongeBodSquarePants: We’re ready to listen to you.
DooManiac: We support you.
ANNREN: We’re not abandoning you!
ohitsMATT: Go to Hell, trolls!
“Jack and I are simply two people who found it easier to talk to each other than we have with any other man or woman. I’m not some starstruck naïve girl with a crush, and he’s not some predatory CEO. I know some of you want us to fit cleanly into these boxes, but we don’t. We make ourownboxes.”
