Mara raises an innocent eyebrow. “I didn’t say anything.”
“You didn’t have to…”
“He doesn’t want a PR scandal, so he makes public hints at you, transforms public places into scenes from the game, and takes you to a public diner… Maybe he doesn’t even know it—you know what men are like—but he doesn’t want this to become public, Dakota, heneedsit to.”
I shake my head. “You’ve been watching too many romance flicks.”
“Nah-uh.” She shakes her head. “If he were the cold, PR-obsessed CEO he’s pretending to be, he wouldn’t have even met you in person.”
“Just because he cares enough to wreck our careers, it doesn’t mean I should let him.”
“Would it wreck it, though?”
“We’ve been over this,” I say, sighing. “Most of my viewers are great. Some? Not so great? And if there’s this big influx of people who just want the drama, it’ll only be a matter of time beforeit’s too stressful, until there’s too many awful comments. Online, once a bandwagon gets started, it’s almost impossible to stop.”
“Don’t worry about that part for now,” Mara says. “Just think about the two of you. Do you want my honest opinion?”
I wink. “Why do you think I bribed you with ice cream?”
She laughs. “You owe him an explanation. I know it’ll be tough. But clearly, based on his reaction when you told him to turn the boat around, he wasn’t trying to love bomb you, Dakky. He was trying to be nice.”
“You’re right,” I murmur. “And I threw it in his face.”
“Just give him a call,” she says.
I glance at the clock. It’s almost one in the morning. My stream ended thirty minutes ago, then Mara swung by. “It’s late—I’ll text.”
Mara smiles. “You two and your messaging obsession…”
I sit up in bed, knees tucked up to my chest, biting my lip as I look at our texting thread. The last exchange reads:
Jack: I think you’re going to love the final phase of this boss, beautiful.
My reply was.
Dakota: I can’t wait. Just make sure it’s not as easy as the expo version!
I take a breath, shocked at how nervous I am. It’s worse than I’ve been for any stream in years.
Dakota: Are you still curious about why I went all weird on the boat?
He types back straight away. I love this about us: no games, no waiting until we reply. Even Mara does that when she meets guys. She says she has to make them sweat. But we make each other sweat enough without resorting to that.
Jack: I’m curious about what upset you so much. But I wouldn’t categorize it as you going ‘all weird’. Something happened on that boat. Or maybe something happened another time, and the boat brought it up. Whatever it is, I’m ready to hear it. If you want to share it.
I take another breath, then let it out shakily.
Dakota: I sometimes compare my life to other people’s. This is a big thing for me, even now, at thirty years old. But for other people, people who have lived harder lives, it would be a blip.
Jack: You don’t need to qualify it. Or make excuses. Or anything like that.
Dakota: Since when did you become so enlightened?
Jack: Since I met you. That sounds like a line, but it’s the truth. I left college, then I lived two decades inside an office. Now, here I am.
I tap my finger against my chin, touched. I wish I could enjoy his compliments and attention without this mental block always holding me back.
Dakota: My dad never hit me. He DID hit my mom, and that’s just one reasons I’ve gone no-contact and I’ll stay no-contact. But he never hit me, not with his fists. But he had this way of controlling us, criticizing, making sure every little thing fit into his idea of who we were supposed to be.
