“I’m not avoiding him!” I protested, but it sounded like a lie.
“Sure, you’re not. See you later, Selena.”
The library was exactly where I needed to be. It was busy on the lower floors, the arts and humanities subjects. I lost myself in the noisy silence. All these students funneling their brainpower into studying felt like the energy shift I needed. I put books back, helped check them out, and generally let my brain drift.
Winter called me a couple of times, and I texted her that I was at work. I didn’t want her worrying about me, and I certainly couldn’t take talking to anyone until I’d processed what had happened yesterday.
Slowly, my mind worked up to the encounter in the street. I let myself recall every detail. The guy’s expression, the way he’d sidled up to talking about the video. What he hadn’t done was tell me what he planned to do with the information.
There had to be something. Why else would he have bothered to tell me all about it? He wanted something, and I doubted it was anything good.
I got a message near the end of my shift.
Bellend: When are you home?
Me: None of your business.
Bellend: … We should talk, heathen.
Me: Pass. I don’t want to talk. If you don’t leave me alone, I’ll move out.
Bellend: Is that meant to put me off? Now I really want to talk.
Fuck.
What did I expect from Brody? That he’d suddenly grown a heart and actually care that I didn’t want to talk about that nightmare? Or that he wouldn’t want me to move out? I’d just given him leverage to win his personal space back.
I finished my shift at the library and went home reluctantly. I went through the house with my hands clenched into hard fists. I was ready to fight to avoid talking about it if I had to.
But there was no sign of Brody. I made it to my room, got inside, and closed the door behind me uninterrupted.
I sank down onto the bed and stared across the room. Dark and depressing thoughts threatened to pull me in. A whirling tide pool in my mind. I had no coping mechanisms. No crutches left to lean on. Brody had taken them all. I went into the bathroom and looked around. Even the glass soap dispenser was gone. The toenail clippers, tweezers, razors. They were all missing. Brody had done a second round and cleared the space out. I didn’t know how to feel about that.
I took my homework out of my bag. That’s how desperate I was. Gradually, I managed to wrestle my mind into homework mode and spent the rest of the night studying. Now, I was more ahead for the week than ever before.
A knock at the door sent my nerves back into high alert. I opened the door slowly.
There was no one there. but a tray sat on the floor. A full plate of chicken breast and salad, a tall glass of water, and my prescription bottle of antidepressants.
Brody
My alarm wentoff at five, just like always. I got out of bed, pulled my workout gear on, and entered Selena’s room using my master key. She couldn’t be trusted to lock anyone out. She was a danger to herself.
First, I drew the curtains wide, ignoring her groans from her bed. She was buried so deep in the covers, all I could see were a few tendrils of hair poking out.
Next, I went to the bathroom, wet a sponge with cold water, and returned to her bedside.
“Rise and shine, heathen. You and me have an appointment today. First of many.”
She moved slightly, sticking a hand out of the covers and giving me the finger.
With a chuckle, I tugged the top half of her covers off, down just enough to expose her face. Then I wiped it with the freezing sponge.
“Hey!” She sat up abruptly and shook my hand off. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Waking you, to help you keep to a schedule. You’re welcome.”
“What schedule? It’s Monday. I don’t have class until after lunch.”
