“It’s not…ugh.I can’t describe it, okay? But I just got more Little vibes than Middle ones.” Becky stabs at her plate of steamed vegetables. “And I guess I wasn’t really prepared for that. I was all mentally set for an easy Middle activity.”
“So…what happened?” I ask, glancing around the dining hall, looking for Benji’s familiar blond head. I can’t see it.
“He got into a verbal argument with one of the other Middles and their Daddy was also frustrated, so I asked him to leave the activity.”
“You didn’t try to de-escalate, or calm him down?” Benji’s words from yesterday afternoon are playing at the back of my mind; his insistence that most Daddies he plays with ‘get over’ his bratting quickly. My heart sinks a little as I realize that Becky has fed into that same loop. “Maybe move him to a different group?”
“And reward his disruptive behavior?” She arches an eyebrow at me. “I’m not some pushover.”
“It’s not about—” Cutting myself off, I sigh. It’s not my place to tell someone else how to live their kink. Needing confirmation, though, I ask, “Was the Middle’s name Benji? Cute, blond twink?”
She nods.
I hum thoughtfully.
As much as his display yesterday was about getting attention and getting off on embarrassment (under his own controlled circumstances), I’m starting to form a whole different theory on his attitude. What if he brats as a means of self-preservation? To test whether someone is safe to be his genuine self with? Because I saw how he mellowed when I surprised him by not only remaining calm, but also with the praise I offered him when he was good and when I requested cuddles despite his earlier bratting. Whereas Becky got frustrated and sent him away. She failed the test, whether he knows he was setting one for her or not.
Beside me, Connor gives my shoulder a nudge with his own. “You know him?”
“He was in my activity yesterday,” I answer, not bothering to smother the smile that curls my lips at the still-so-recent memories. With a shrug and an apologetic grimace towards Becky, I add, “I had fun with his bratting.”
She rolls her eyes.
Con, on the other hand, snorts. “Why doesn’t that surprise me?”
“He was funny,” I tell him, “and a little disruptive, yes, but he just wanted attention. He’s here on his own, and that’s gotta be daunting when you’re in headspace.”
“Softie.” Connor accuses between fake coughs.
“You’re one to talk.” Suddenly remembering that he was actually paired up for this whole event, I look around, as if his Littles are going to suddenly manifest. “Where are your Littles, anyway? Is that going okay?”
His smile turns all gooey, proving that, yes, he is just as soft as I am. “Ace and Freya are napping in the cabin right now. I’ll take some dinner back with me. We’re going to go stargazing later, so they’re conserving energy…though I’ll probably walk in on them having sex again.”
“Again?”
“I told you they were a couple looking for a Daddy, right?” He shrugs. “They’rereallyinto each other. And they like it when I walk in on them and sit down to watch. It’s all pre-negotiated.”
“You lucky bastard.”
Connor nods and scratches as his beard. “Even if it’s only for this week, I’ll admit I’ve lucked out with my assigned pairing. Maybe next time you should volunteer to be paired up.”
“Still not looking for a relationship, dude.”
“It doesn’t have to lead to a relationship,” he says, his lips quirking up teasingly. “But it is interesting that that’s where your mind went.”
“Shut up. We both know how fast these things can develop. It’s all part of the lifestyle. That’s how Dan and Soph ended up in a throuple — one minute they’re ‘just playing’ with a Little, the next minute, Parker has moved in with them.” It’s no secret that attachments form quickly with kink. It’s not difficult to fallhard and fast when you’re being so vulnerable and trusting with someone. I waggle my finger at my friend. “Mark my words, Con. You’ll be getting serious with your Littles soon enough. Especially if they’ve been actively looking for a Daddy to join them.”
He doesn’t refute any of that, except to shrug and say, “Well, I’m not counting my chickens until they’ve hatched. I really like Ace and Freya, though, so I won’t lie and say I’m not hoping they’ll want to keep seeing me even after camp is over.”
“Well, I hope they do, too, then, bud.”
I think about how happy he would probably be, settling down with two Littles to dote on. Then I realize that, outside of phone calls and very rare cross-country visits, I likely won’t ever get to see him living the dream. Melancholy washes over me sluggishly and it’s hard to shake off after that.
***
“All right, Littles,” I clap my hands together and grin at the assembled group on the small stretch of sand that leads to the lake’s edge, “today we’re building sandcastles.”
It’s hard to hold onto the funk from yesterday when today’s weather is so perfect and the people I’m with are so cheerful and adorable, which is kind of exactly what I was hoping for when I volunteered to switch to running the Litttles’ activity for the afternoon. Sun, sand, and cute, enthusiastic Littles is a formula for an instant mood-boost.
