He's deflecting, and I know he's deflecting, but neither of us pushes it.
"It's just a hookup," I say, because the words are familiar and safe.
Soren looks at me. He doesn't say anything, just gives me that patient, steady expression. The lie hangs heavy between us.
"Okay," I admit. "It might not be just a hookup."
"That's allowed," he says. The way he says it—simple and sure, no lecture, no big deal—makes the anxious knot in my chest loosen a fraction.
My phone buzzes behind the stack of textbooks. We both look at it. Soren's eyes crinkle.
"Go," he says. "I'll watch the desk."
"You don't work here."
"I'll watch it anyway. Go read your messages."
I grab the phone and duck behind the shelves.
***
Back at the apartment, Benji's bedroom door is shut. The heavy bass line of some electronic track vibrates through the wall, which means he's in a mood I'll need to check on in an hour.
I sit cross-legged on my bed, scrolling back through the day's messages. I pick the ones that are safe enough to screenshot for the Swipe Squad group chat. Safe enough meaning: no mention of my stomach, my slick, or the worduseful.
I pick the hot stuff. The hands on my waist, theI'm not in a rush with you. The things that will make Jude scream and Benji pretend to be unimpressed. The parts where he saidanyone who treated you like you were there to be useful didn't deserve to touch youstay in my camera roll. Sharing the heat is easy, but sharing the tenderness feels like handing someone a key to a room I didn't know I had.
I drop three screenshots into the chat and wait.
Jude:OH MY GOD
Jude:MILO REYES
Jude:I AM LOOKING RESPECTFULLY AT THESE DMs AND THIS MAN WANTS TO DEVOUR YOU
Jude:MY APP. I TOLD ALL OF YOU. I TOLD EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU AND YOU DOUBTED ME
Benji:his grammar is too good for a hookup app. i don't trust it
Jude:HIS GRAMMAR IS GOOD BECAUSE HE'S A QUALITY ALPHA, BENJAMIN
Benji:nobody who capitalizes their texts on knotme is normal.
Shay: ??
Soren: ??
I smile at Soren's heart. He already knows more than the chat does, and he's not making it a thing.
Jude:MILO. Details. NOW. Is he hot? How big? What's his knot situation? Don't be coy
Milo:i don't know what he looks like, it's anonymous
Jude:WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE
Milo:his profile pic is a barbecue photo from far away. i can see that he's big and has nice arms but that's it
Benji:a barbecue photo. he's definitely 40
