"How did what start?”
"This phobia of yours.”
"It’s not a phobia, remember? It’s a discomfort,” she said, trying to convince herself.
I chuckled. "Right.”
"It’s stress that is triggered by certain scenarios."
"You know there's a term for that.”
"Yes, I know there's a name for that. But if I don't name it, it's not real."
I laughed again. She was half serious.
Elana kept quiet for a moment.
"If you don't want to talk about it, I understand.”
She took a deep breath and settled herself. "It's not something that’s easy to talk about.”
"Fair enough.”
After another long beat, she said, "I was attacked when I was 16. At that point in time, I was young and naïve and didn't know how the world worked. I didn't realize that there were bad people out there. I mean, I knew there were bad people out there, but I never thought I would become a victim. I didn't have that mindset. I was strong and independent," she said, puffing herself up in a dramatic fashion. "I was on an elevator. A guy got on. I smiled and said hello. Then, next thing I knew, he pepper-sprayed me, tied me up, and took me from the elevator. He dragged me through the parking garage and shoved me into the trunk of his vehicle. He took me to a remote farmhouse and kept me locked in a box forthree weeks. I never thought I was going to get out of there.”
I was shocked. "I totally get your aversion to elevators and small spaces.”
A smile of vindication pulled her plump lips.
"It’s pretty brave of you to come down here and attempt something like this," I said.
"I think so. And I think I'm doing a pretty damn good job, if I do say so myself. I'm not going to let my past limit me. This is something I want to do. I want to be part of a space mission. I want to break new ground and go down in the history books. You know what they say—do something worth writing about, or write something worth reading. I'd like to do both at some point.” She paused. "Maybe I'm not cut out for this. But maybe I am. I'm never going to know what I’m capable of unless I put myself to the test.”
"I think you're doing pretty well so far.”
She smiled. "Thank you.”
Wong's voice crackled over the speaker. "Neptune, Oceanus, are you okay?”
"Yes. Minor hiccup,” Elana said. “All systems functioning normally.”
"What happened? We got your message, but comms were down briefly.”
"Loose connection," she said. "No cause for alarm.”
"Are you comfortable proceeding with the mission as planned?”
"Affirmative.”
"Copy that.”
After we inspected all of the anchor points, we returned to the habitat, and Elana navigated us into the moon pool. We surfaced, and she powered down the sub.
In a tentative voice, she said, "What happens in the sub stays in the sub, right? I’d prefer if the rest of the crew didn't know my back story."
I gestured that my lips were sealed. "I don't kiss and tell.”
She lifted an intrigued eyebrow. "Good to know.”
