That made Amber laugh and cry harder.
Regan handed me a tissue, then another, then finally the whole little packet because apparently my face had surrendered completely.
After that, the night got easier.
Maybe because we had survived the hard part. Maybe because everyone silently agreed not to make me feel too much at once. We moved inside and watched movies in the massive living room, all of us sprawled across couches and chairs like a strange, sunburned family of criminals and almost-criminals pretending to be normal.
Amber picked the first movie and chose something with singing, which made Tarak threaten to leave twice and then watch the entire thing with terrifying focus. Edge ate cake straight off a napkin and pretended he wasn’t enjoying it. Regan curled beside me, her feet tucked under her, and kept touching my hair like she needed to reassure herself I was there.
I kept touching my earrings.
Then my ring.
Then my earrings again.
And every once in a while, my eyes drifted toward the terrace doors.
No Dylan.
No Nate.
I told myself it was fine.
It was fine.
It was my birthday, and I had my father here. I had Tarak. Regan. Amber. I had diamonds from one love story and turquoise from another. I had a belly full of cake and salt still in my hair.
It was enough.
It was more than enough.
So why did the empty place where Dylan should have been feel so loud?
Later, the men decided they needed a fire on the beach.
“Because apparently the ocean wasn’t enough nature for one day,” Regan muttered.
Edge and Tarak carried cigars outside like they were preparing for a religious ceremony. Amber followed with a blanket, a glass of wine, and the confidence of someone who planned to supervise rather than help. Regan rolled her eyes and went with them, claiming she was only there to prevent the men from turning a beach fire into an international incident.
I stayed behind for a while.
Then the moonlight on the water got to me.
I changed into a black one-piece, left Mandy’s ring in the little dish by my bed so I wouldn’t lose it, but kept the diamond studs in my ears. I liked the way they felt. Tiny. Cold. Real.
The beach below the villa was private, guarded at both ends, and quiet enough that the rest of Cabo felt like another country.The fire crackled farther down near the rocks, where Edge and Tarak sat with cigars and low voices. Regan and Amber were with them, wrapped in blankets, their laughter drifting now and then through the dark.
I slipped into the ocean alone.
The water was cool after the heat of the day. It wrapped around me gently, lifting my hair, sliding over my skin like it knew every bruise and had decided not to press too hard. I swam until the voices faded behind me and the moon blurred on the surface around my arms.
For a while, I floated.
Eighteen.
Alive.
Not free exactly.
