“I’m so sorry, Fenella,” Marsali told her. “What can I do?”
“Tell me how to get to Murray. And that yer da—and yer clan—would welcome me. I canna remain here and watch Keenan wed another. I canna! But I dinna ken where to go. Or how to leave Máirín behind. But I must.”
She fought back tears, but lost the battle when Marsali put an arm around her shoulders.
“’Tis really that bad?”
“’Tis worse,” Fenella replied, choking back a sob and breathing hard to get control of herself. She was stronger than this. “I’m sorry,” she said once she could speak.
“Ye have naught to be sorry for. Ye have been good for both of them. And ye were about to be married. None of this is yer fault. I dinna ken what Keenan is thinking. What he’s doing.” Marsali released her and stepped back, determination in her eyes. “But I will ask Gavan what is going on. Perhaps ye are wrong, and Keenan is simply dealing with suddenly becoming laird. When he gains his stride, he will return to ye.”
“Nay, I dinna think he will. He refuses to see me. Not even in passing. He hasna spoken a word to me since that day on the kirk steps. He willna meet my gaze.”
“Well,” Marsali huffed, irritation evident, “we will fix that.”
“Nay, please. If he must wed another for the good of the clan, how can I stand in the way? But in that case, I must leave MacNabb.”
Marsali planted her fists on her hips. “Ye must stand up for yerself. Confront him. If he repudiates ye, then ye will ken ye must leave.”
Fenella shook her head. “I tried once. He wouldna speak to me. I dinna ken if I can try again. I couldna bear to hear the words from his lips.”
“If ye are truly to leave him behind, ye must. It will do ye nay good to go to Murray and continue to pine for Keenan.”
Marsali was right. Fenella knew it. But she didn’t know if she had the strength to do what she suggested, or if her heart would survive another attempt.
“Ye must try again. What if he realizes how poorly he’s treated ye, and is sorry for it? What if he still wants to wed with ye,” Marsali insisted, “but has simply been swept up in the day-to-day tasks he must now take responsibility for?”
What if he still loved her? Fenella shook her head. He’d closed his eyes rather than look at her. Since their aborted wedding, she’d become invisible to him—literally. “Ye didna see him in the hall when I tried to make him speak to me. To see me. ’Tis over, Marsali.”
“I will write a letter to my da,” Marsali promised, “that ye can take with ye, should the need arise. Gavan can escort ye. Murray will welcome ye.” She held up a hand. “But if ye wish to stay—for yer sake or for wee Máirín’s, talk to Keenan first, so if ye must, ye can leave with a clear mind and heart. Ye must give him a chance. Give both of ye a chance.”
She was right. Fenella had to fight if she wanted the future she’d almost had in her grasp. She would find the strength to get through to him. Or leave him and MacNabb. “Very well.”
Fenella’s resolve lasted long enough to get her to the laird’s solar. But it was empty. Not knowing where Keenan might be, she went next to the nursery. Both Kyla and the infant were gone as well. Perhaps the nurse had taken Máirín to Keenan’s chamber for a visit with her father. The thought warmed Fenella but hurt as well. Why would he not have her bring his daughter to him? It was one more indication that he was through with her.
Fenella hoped Marsali finished the letter to her father soon.
Hours later, she heard raised voices coming from the laird’s solar as Keenan met with his advisors. Rather than worrying her, knowing his time was taken up by the responsibilities of his new position gave her a little comfort, but not enough to drive the thought of going to Murray from her mind.
What did worry her was that no one she asked had seen Kyla or Keenan’s daughter. Fenella searched the keep, then headed outside. Where could the nurse have taken her?
When Fenella failed to find them in the usual places the nurse might go, Fenella’s concern grew. She headed out of the keep’s gates into the glen. Kyla knew Fenella took the bairn outside at times. Surely the nurse would not have gone far from the keep with the laird’s daughter. But Fenella met no one.
She returned to the keep and entered the great hall just as the council was leaving the laird’s solar. She didn’t want to face Keenan, but he needed to know his daughter was missing.
He was standing behind his desk when she entered, and his brothers were standing with him. What had happened during the council meeting that they remained behind?
Gavan noticed her first. “Fenella. Is something amiss?”
Keenan frowned at her, nearly stealing her resolve and making it harder for her to speak.
“I canna find Máirín or her nurse. I’ve been all through the keep and along the edge of the woods.” The words hurt her, but she knew they would hurt Keenan more.
“Missing? How can a nurse and a bairn go missing?” Keenan’s brother Gregor gave her a suspicious frown. “Is this some plan of yers to keep the bairn for yerself?”
The blood drained from Fenella’s face as Keenan’s expression turned fierce. “How could ye ask such a thing?” she stammered. “I just spent the morning looking for her.” Andshe’d told Marsali she didn’t know how she could leave the wee lass. What would Keenan think if he heard that?
“Dinna fash,” Gavan told her. “We’ll have some men retrace yer steps. They have to be somewhere in the keep.” His assurance soothed her, but Keenan’s accusatory silence hurt.
