“I’ll be right back,” he murmurs and leaves us.
Lennon and I make our way downstairs and find her little froggy flashlight in the kitchen. She’s a smart kid, prepared. She shows me where emergency candles are, and asks if I’m allowed to use matches. It makes me smile to know that even when she’s this freaked out, she still puts someone else’s safety at the front of her mind.
After we get a bunch of the candles lit and placed around the living room, I grab a big blanket, and we sit down on the couch. Lennon tucks herself against my side, and I cover us up. We listen to the house settle into quiet, only the sound of rain and water washing past outside in places it shouldn’t be.
“I don’t really like it when it’s dark,” Lennon whispers.
“I don’t either,” I admit. “But, we are okay. We can hear the rain. That means that the world is still out there.”
Lennon is silent for a minute. “I like it when you’re here,” she confesses quietly, like saying it out loud will break something. I feel my chest tighten.
“You do?”
She nods and presses her face against my arm, getting comfortable. “You make Daddy smile. You make us laugh, and you don’t get mad when I ask a lots of questions.”
I swallow hard. This little girl does have some sorcery in her; I was right. She’s got me wrapped around her finger.
“Questions are important,” I tell her.
The sound of the generator sputtering to life breaks the silence. The lights flicker once and then come on, a warm glow filling the living room. Lennon looks around like it’s magic.
A moment later, Beckett comes through the door, wet and breathless, his hair plastered to his forehead.
God, he’s beautiful.
“Alright, girls. Generator is on. Should be good for a while, we just can’t push it.”
“Push it as in..” I trail off.
“You know—no TV, fridge, or microwave. None of the things that make life easy,” he sums up.
Lennon groans. “But popcorn!” She complains.
“You haven’t wanted popcorn in forever,” Beckett challenges her.
“Yeah, but now I want it.” She whines over a yawn.
Beckett rolls his eyes. “Alright, kiddo, party is over. Let’s all get back to bed.”
We all head back up the stairs, Lennon hugging me quickly before she and Beckett go back in her room to tuck her in.
I head back to my room and sit down on the bed, waiting for him to come back up so we can talk.
He joins me a minute later, leaning against the wall, sighing.
“That can’t happen again,” he tells me quietly.
“I know,” I admit. I already knew.
“I can’t risk confusing her,” he groans, rubbing a hand over his face. “Or you.”
“I understand,” I say, the lump in my throat threatening to cut me off. I do understand, though. I also know that it fucking hurts.
“Goodnight, Clover Jane. If you need anything?—”
I stop him. “I know. Just holler.”
He grins sadly and nods, pulling my door closed behind him.
