Tommy said, “Okay.”
“Okay, I’m muting it now.” Newbury pressed the Mute button and turned back to me.
Pullman was already shaking his head. “We cannot send her in there like this. Look at her.”
I shot him a look. I’d been through a huge ordeal.How did he expect me to look?
“How do you feel?” Newbury asked. “Could you go in? If we put you in a vest, would you feel safe doing it?”
My mother grabbed my arm. “No way. You are not sending her in there.”
“She’s the only one he’s asked to talk to,” Newbury said. Pullman tried to protest, but once he saw the expression on Newbury’s face, he fell silent.
The question took me a couple seconds to weigh in my mind. Would I feel safe going into the house with Tommy? I wanted to say yes, without any hesitation. Tommy was my brother. He wouldn’t hurt me, surely. But then I remembered how we’d gotten here, and my chest tightened in fear. He could absolutely hurt his sister. He already had.
“I’ll go,” I said, nodding. Newbury didn’t waste a minute.
“Tommy?” he called out. “You still there, bud?” I knew Tommy would hate that.
“Yes,” Tommy said.
“Good,” Newbury replied. “Listen, we’re going to send Rose in there to talk with you, all right?”
Tommy took a deep breath. “Thank you.”
“But if we’re going to do that for you,” he added casually, “you have to do something for us, okay? We’re going to need you to send out the kids. Suzannah’s here and she wants them with her.”
“I wouldneverhurt my kids!” Tommy shouted into the phone.
I recoiled at the fury in his tone. I couldn’t match it to the brother I knew. The violence that seemed to keep emerging from him.
“No one said you would,” Newbury clarified quickly. “But there’s a lot going on, and it would be better if they were out here. So if I send in your sister, you need to send them out, all right? We’ll do an even trade. Does that sound okay to you?”
There was a long pause. I dug my nails into the knees of my leggings.
“You promise you’re coming in, Rosie?” Tommy asked, sounding like a child himself.
I tried to pull myself together. I thought of Marta and all that media training she had forced down my throat. Deep breath. Count to three. Never let them know what you’re thinking. I had a poker face, and it was time to use it.
“Yeah, Tommy.” My voice was strong. “That’s what we’re gonna do.”
“Okay,” Tommy said again.
“That’s good, Tommy. Very good. Get ready for a knock,” Newbury said.
“Fine,” Tommy replied, and the line clicked off.
34
I tried to shut off my brain as Pullman and Newbury got me ready. We were in one of the cop vans down the street, out of sight of the house. As Pullman strapped the wire underneath my shirt, I thought of Tommy and me as kids arguing over the practicality ofJurassic Park 3. As they fastened the straps of the bulletproof vest over my shoulders, I remembered his skill at claw machines, always winning me whatever cheap stuffed toy I was fixated on. My lower lip trembled.
A female cop gathered my hair in her hands, pulling it into a low bun. “It’s better to have it this way,” she assured me, securing it with an elastic hair tie. “Trust me.”
One last tug on the straps on my vest from Pullman, double-checking it was secure, and I was ready. Two SWAT cops would lead me to the door. I would knock. Tommy would send out Daisy and Felix. I would take their place. The wire would record our conversation. My goal was to keep him talking and deescalate the situation. They wanted Tommy to admit his crimes. What he had done to Hazel and Alex. Then they wanted him to come out and surrender.
“It’s bulletproof,” Pullman reminded me. The vest felt stiff and uncomfortable. My arms looked tiny sticking out of it. “He may want you to take it off, but it’s better to keep it on, if you can. Please.” I nodded.
“We’re going to be listening to everything you say. If things get bad in there, if you feel unsafe, you’re to say, “I can’t believe this,” and then lead him to the window. Somewhere we can see you.”
