There was another painfully long silence. And it only fueled my frustration. He really wasn’t going to give this information up easily, was he?
“What did she say?”
“Are you asking because you’re wondering if I found out about your illicit love letters with your dead girlfriend’s sister?” I asked. “Because if so, the answer is yes. I did.”
Will took in a sharp breath. “Rose—”
“Why wouldn’t you tell me that?” I demanded, cutting him off. “How could you be writing letters to one of the Hopelys and not tell me, Will?”
“It didn’t seem important,” he said softly.
“She said she had doubts about your guilt, Will! How could that not be important? That’s something we could have used in appeals!”
“I didn’t think about it that way. It was just … nice to have someone to talk to.”
“Someone to commiserate with about how you think I shouldn’t have written the book?” I snapped, letting the accusation stick. Victoria’s claim tasted horrible coming out of my mouth.
Will was silent for a minute, an excruciatingly long minute in which I could hear only his breathing and the angry beating of my own heart.
“I wish she hadn’t told you that,” he said finally.
“Well, she did.” I could feel hot, angry tears forming in the corner of my eyes and I wiped at them, glad this was a phone call and my brother couldn’t see the reaction his words had caused. “Do you have any idea what that was like to hear, Will? I’ve given up my entire life. My name and my reputation. For you! For proving you didn’t commit this crime!”
“I never asked you to do that, Rose.”
“You never turned down the fancy lawyers and appeals that it paid for though, did you?” I snapped. “Or the commissary deposits. Say the word, Will, and I’ll cut off the ‘blood money.’”
“Look,” Will said, his voice much calmer. “I don’t hate the book, Rose. Or the help you’ve provided over the years because of it. I’m grateful to you. You know that. You’re the only one who has stood by me. I could never forget that.”
I let him talk, still in complete disbelief.
“And I knowwhyyou wrote the book. I get it. The book made people pay attention. It paid for what I needed. And I’m sure it was cathartic. What happened affected you almost as much as it did me. I know you had a different perspective on the situation, but the reason I told Victoria I wish you hadn’t written the book is because of how it portrayedher. I was never okay with that.”
Hermeaning Alex.
The thorn in our relationship. The thing we didn’t like to talk about. The biggest fight Will and I ever had occurred because of her, and still he wouldn’t allow me to hate her for it.
“I loved Alex,” he said. “She was the love of my life, and I have to live every day knowing that she isn’t here anymore. I don’t wish that on anyone. Whenever I’m feeling sorry for myself about being stuck in here, I remember that she doesn’t get to feel sorry for herself. She doesn’t get to feel anything at all anymore because she’s dead. Someonetookher from me and her family, and there’s nothing worse than that. Even people thinking I did it. I just want her to be able to rest, Rose. Peacefully.”
I let his words sit in the air, not knowing what to say. I could understand where he was coming from, but it didn’t mean I regretted writing my book either. I still stood by it and everything that had come after.
“I love you, Rosie,” Will said. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about writing to Victoria, but it didn’t seem important. It was just nice to have someone else to talk to, especially about Alex. It’s not as if you ever want to reminisce about the good things she did.”
He was right about that at least.
“ButVictoria?” I stressed, my voice lighter now. “She was always the worst of them.”
“Beggars can’t be choosers.”
“I guess.”
“So now that we’ve moved past the letter thing,” Will said, entirely glossing over the last minute of our conversation, “what else did Victoria tell you? Where are you looking next?”
I spent the next five minutes telling him what Victoria and Kayleigh had told me, and what I’d learned since. Ten minutes after that, Will had to end the call and I went back to reading my book, to Hazel’s annotations. I dove into chapter 30, “The Party,” reading through Hazel’s scathing commentary of Alex.
SO SHE WAS A CHEATER?Hazel had scribbled.UGHHHH!!!
Farther down the page, Hazel had underlined my description of the man Alex was with and added:Blonde? Sailboat tattoo? Check Isaac description pg 129.
