I licked my lips, and those dark eyes darted down to watch the movement. His breath dusted over my lips, so close I could practically taste him already. Warmth swirled in my stomach. “Thank you,” I murmured.
His voice was gravelly as he replied, “I promised to keep my queen alive, didn’t I?”
The usual warnings rang in my ears—it was a myth, an illusion, and so on—but with the residual adrenaline still flowing through my veins, my mind struggled to hear them. An apology perched on my tongue. For hitting him. For snapping at him. For the stupid wordsromantic entanglement. He’d tease me for it—royals did not apologize, the Gods-Chosen did not,Inever had. But I thought it might be worth it.
And then his gaze sank lower. To my side. “Sorry,” he mumbled, and released my wrist as he rolled off me.
I stared at the rustling leaves above me in blank surprise. Jasimhad fucked me many times. He knew exactly when I was giving permission, and he’d nevernotseized that opportunity before.
“How’s your wound?” he asked.
When I looked at him, his eyes were firmly focused on my side. Which was stinging fiercely. But I said, “Fine.” Then I stood and brushed the sand off me, fire branding my cheeks.
Jasim merely nodded and stood, too, holstering his scimitar. He avoided my eyes. “We should get going, then.”
“Yeah.” I scratched my nape as I watched him ready our camels, my brows tight. Two seconds ago, he’d been willing to die for me. Now he couldn’t get away from me fast enough.
Unbidden, my nightmare rose in my mind. I hadn’t thought about that night in years, but the memory was so vivid, I could almost smell the pile of bodies. Maybe King Zaid’s death had conjured it, or my own near end. But as I dug my nails into the irritated skin of my neck, another thought occurred to me. One that made my blood chill.
Athar was the God of Mischief and Dreams. He was also Shaya’s son, and my half brother. It was possible he had sent me the memory. That he wanted to help me reach our father.
Sacrifices are necessary to reach him. You know that. But I needed a bigger one for this.
Jasim glanced over at me, holding the camels’ reins. “Ready?”
I stared at him as the thought took shape, calcified into a plan. I had intended to take Nasir’s best calf from Reeda and spill its blood in the Temple of Shaya. But if my nightmare had been a message from Athar, a cow would not be enough. I needed something bigger.
That horrible feeling crushed my chest again. Heavier. My ribs groaned beneath it.
As Jasim helped me onto the camel, careful of my wound, careful not to hurt me, my eyes burned, and an epiphany settled on my shoulders as loud as the cicadas chittering around us. Funny that I had never realized it before.
I was a really, really bad person.
THIRTEENSAMIRA
I opened my eyes and stared up at the logs in the ceiling with furrowed brows. My room didn’t have logs in the ceiling. It was smooth, made of brown clay. I turned to ask Nadia—
I lurched upright.
The too-soft bed.
The bathing tub.
My queen’s nightgown discarded on the floor.
I wasn’t in my room in Khada Palace. I was in Kaldfold.Kaldfold.
Events flooded back to me with startling swiftness. I swung my bare feet to the warm floor and willed my racing pulse to calm, drawing several deep breaths. Velka said the king would explain everything today. Rade had seemed… more reasonable than I’d expected. Even if he hadn’t anticipated Queen Amunet being here, I didn’t think he wanted to kill me. If he had, he would’ve done it the moment he saw me. He certainly wouldn’t have unchained me and let me enjoy pork and kefir in the privacy of my own cabin.
No, he wanted something else. Something he needed me alive for.
Nerves slightly more settled now that I’d come to a decision, I did up the clasps of my tunic, stuffed my feet into boots, and knocked on the door.
The lock clicked, and then I was staring up into Keir’s smile,bordered by twisting blue tattoos. The morning sunlight peeking through the clouds behind him attempted to soften his harsh features. A useless endeavor. This man was anything but soft. “Morning, Majesty.”
I jutted my chin in the air as confidently as I could. “I wish to see the king.”
“That’s nice.”
