Well, if this is the real him now, maybe he and Blairwillwork out: maybe they’ll flit around the world together, tied to each other and not necessarily a specific place. Birds of a feather and all that.
“For the record,” Matteo says, pulling me out of my thoughts, “I never meant for things to go like they did with Blair—it all just kind of happened.”
How can he not see that this excuse doesn’t actually make anything less painful? When he saysit all just kind of happened, all I hear isI liked what was happening too much to stop it.
I’m not like Matteo: how people gravitate to him, how he makes friends everywhere he goes. It’s much harder for me to let people in.
When he left, my world went silent for a long time. It’s harder to make lasting friends when you’re out in the woods with strangers all the time, in a leadership position that prevents you from getting as close as everyone else gets to each other…and then they all inevitably fly home, and the next group takes their place.
I’m still at a loss for words when the sound of footsteps—the crunch of hiking boots in gravel—saves me.
There’s Hunter, his six-foot-five shadow long under the morning sun. He’s got a speckled metal camp cup in each hand.
“Either of you want some coffee?” he asks.
Matteo and I spring up simultaneously. Neither of us says so, but I know without a doubt he’s saying a silent thank-you to Hunter for getting us out of this conversation, just like I am.
We follow him back to camp.
The coffee, I admit, is very good.
DAY THREE
Cloverleaf Creek Campsite to Mackenzie Lake
Fed by glacial meltwater and snowpack, the rivers and lakes in the Sierras are renowned for their glittering, crystal-clear waters. Popular activities in these areas of the parks include fishing, kayaking, and swimming, with many such lakes set against a majestic mountain backdrop. Be sure to pack a camera (and your swimsuit)!
—Henry Herrington,Backpacking the Sierras: A Beginner’s Handbook(Fourth Edition)
6:32 A.M. • DAY 3 • SADIE’S JOURNAL
Well: here I am out in the woods, and I have successfully made it through *two* entire nights without a) a pillow-top mattress, and b) air conditioning. And we only had *one* tent disaster, so I guess overall, that’s a win.
Thorn thinks it would be helpful for me to write out my thoughts & fears & feelings so I can look back on them after all of this is over to see how much I’ve grown…and I guess there isn’t a lot I love more than making lists, and I’ve always been an overachiever when it comes to assignments, so here goes:
Hard Things
Heavy backpack
SO MUCH WALKING
Whyyyy did I bring these shoes
Slick rocks
Mosquitos suck (literally)
Sweat everywhere
Feels like I’m slowing the group down sometimes
Uncomfortable sleeping conditions*
Scary Things
BEARS
Tent catastrophe nearly gave me a heart attack
