“I saw the cheese fairies combine, then split apart. I’ve seen them blow up and then reform. Hell, your guys went through my GI tract and came out as sparkly farts.”
Feta grinned and his baby face said, “That was fun!”
Yeah. For them. “I am going to give a baby to the fairy prince. If you can meld into one baby that looks exactly like Aaron, then I will give you to him and he will take you to Fairy Fairyland.”
Feta and Erin looked at each other, appearing to think hard. Meanwhile, Wulfric rubbed his hand over his face. “You would have to be an exact replica. You would have to feel magically like Aaron, not just look like him. And you would have to help us hide the real baby.”
Bruce turned to Wulfric. “Could you help with that? Would the prince be able to see our child beneath your fairy glamour?”
“If he sees me, he can see the child.”
“But he doesn’t have to see you, right?”
Wulfric nodded. “I will hide your child. Mother can help with that, but this is really risky. If the prince finds out, he will come back for you.”
“And he will find out,” Laddin said. “The pixies can’t keep up the charade forever.”
Everyone looked at the two fairies who were slowly moving toward each other. Feta rolled over, his baby body aging to the size of a six-month- old. Erin dashed forward and back, as if she wanted to do it but then changed her mind.
“Is there a way to end the contract? To declare it done, with no one able to take retribution after it’s over?”
“Maybe,” Wulfric said, but he didn’t look happy about it. “They’ll add ‘the Deceiver’ at the end of your name. It’ll end your dealings with the fairies once and for all. They won’t work with you again.” Bruce guessed that was what they’d done to Wulfric.
“I don’t care,” Laddin said emphatically. “I’ll be happy if I never see them again.”
“That’s mean!” Erin and Feta said together.
“I don’t mean you!” he rushed to say, though from the look on his face, he absolutely did. “Besides, you’ll be in Fairy Fairyland like you want, right?”
“Fairyland,” they both said together, in the same tone they’d use forNirvanaorheavenortriple fudge chocolate cake with sprinkles.
“So?” Bruce pressed the fairies. “Can you do it? Can you merge together to make a baby?”
Erin poked out her lips. “I can do it. You don’t need him.”
“I can do it,” Feta said. It was weird hearing Feta’s voice coming out of a kid. “You don’t need her.”
And right there, he saw the sticking point. Back when they’d first met, the cheese fairies had been fighting with Erin’s fairies. They each believed that the other was preventing them from getting to Fairyland. It wasn’t true, but they’d believed it. And so now they didn’t like each other enough to go together.
Bruce crossed his arms and put on his sternest paternal voice. “You do this together or not at all. Smoked Gouda said that I was the one who got you to Fairyland.”
“Us!” Feta cried. “Not them!”
“Together or not at all.”
The two pixies looked at each other—one big, one small, and both pouting.
She pointed at Bruce. “You have to think very hard.”
Feta pointed at Laddin. “You have to want it very much.”
That wasn’t a problem. Bruce crossed over and took Laddin’s hand. The energy flowed between them easily, from him into Laddin and back again. It was even stronger than it had been by the lake.
Meanwhile, Laddin grinned up at him. “You’re going to make a great dad,” he said. Then he added with a mock-stern look, “Together or not at all.”
Bruce grinned as he held up Laddin’s hand. “Together,” he echoed. “Or not at all.”
Then they turned to look at the fairies. It was all up to them as Bruce began to concentrate. He wanted an exact replica of Aaron—one so perfect in every way that Bitterroot wouldn’t be able to tell the difference.
