I nod.
“The things you went through, Wyn,” he shakes his head. “There isn’t a single person who would question the amount of time you needed to start feeling good again.”
I swipe a tear away. I knew that, but it feels good to hear it.
“I thought I was going to be asked to leave, after you had left out that back door. I messed up the one rule they had there—make sure Hideaway is kept secret. But they didn’t ask me to leave, and I still chose to come back.”
“You were ready then,” he says, trying to work out what I’m sharing.
“If I stayed, I could never tell someone I cared for the whole truth without putting others in danger. I had never felt what I did with you in those moments, in that bar. I thought if I got even the slightest taste of that again, it would be worth it.”
She deserves so much more than just those moments.
“Come in here with me?” I ask, looking up at him. “I’m not ready to get out, but I want you closer.” I smile a little, dazed by the warmth.
His eyes never leave mine as he toes off his boots, then socks. Lifting his shirt at the hem, he pulls it over his head. He takes out the elastic that held back his hair, and his dark brown hair falls to his shoulders.
He shoves his pants to the floor. Stepping out of his boxer briefs next, I get a full glimpse at his broad back and the way his sculpted ass flexes with every move. Even now, I can’t help but smirk at how much I like looking at his body.
He’s beautiful, more so than any other man I’ve ever seen, but the parts of him that are the most breathtaking come with the things he says and the actions he takes. It doesn’t feel like taking or settling with him. It’s uncontrollable, as if I’m fallingfor this man in a way that’ll alter everything all over again. Or maybe I already have. Maybe this is just the proof.
Pulling another towel from the rack, he smiles at me when he notices my attention on his cock.
“I have minimal control over how my body reacts when I’m close to you, Crowne,” he says as he lowers himself into the warm water.
I shift around, moving my legs so that there’s space for him to fit. “Believe me, I understand,” I say on a breathy exhale. The water rises and splashes over the edge as every inch of him lowers into the bath.
“Then add in the fact that you’re naked in a tub,” he says with the slightest smile on his lips. “My dick didn’t get the memo that I’m only here to be close to you, take care of you, and make sure you’re okay.”
Leaning forward, he smooths his hands down my legs and lifts my feet so they rest on top of his thighs. He runs his fingers over my skin soothingly, and it feels so damn good, my body relaxes muscle by muscle. This is what safe feels like—a warm bath, understanding that doesn’t feel earned, but given freely, soothing touches. The details that were just shared, what he’s just learned about his father, none of it can be easy to hear and accept, and yet he’s letting himself relax the same way I am. The back of his neck rests on the tub’s edge, and his eyes drift closed.
“Come here. You’re too far away,” he says without opening his eyes.
I sit up and shift closer to him. Julian lifts his head to watch me as I lean forward and kiss the center of his chest. Turning around, I settle myself against his body. I glide my fingers up and down his forearm, draped along the edge. Lost in this moment—the quiet and warmth—my entire body relaxes.
“Tell me you’re okay,” I whisper. “Or tell me you’re not.” I tilt my head slightly against his chest so I can see his face. “You’re taking care of me, but this isn’t just about me, Julian.”
He moves his hand into the water, and his fingers brush along my scar. He runs his touch up and then down before he holds his palm tightly against my side. My face squints up, but I shove away the anger and embarrassment. Instead, I take a deep breath and exhale through it. Even when he should be thinking of himself, what all of this took from him, he’s still holding me in the most tender place.I’ve never felt braver.
“I’m okay, baby,” he says as he kisses my head. “We’re going to be more than okay.”
And for the first time in a long time, I believe it.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Julian
She fell asleep sometimeafter midnight, wrapped up in my arms, right where she belongs. I held on to her long after she drifted off, and long after I finally had as well. I wanted to tell her I’ll never leave her side, that she’s the easiest choice I’ve ever made, but that will have its time. There’s a part of me that knew as soon as I saw her here in Rumor. As I was strapped to a fucking chair, I knew that even if I wasn’t bound to it, I wasn’t going anywhere.
If anything had gone differently, if a single one of the tragic things that crossed our paths had been different, I wouldn’t be here.
Staring out the side windows, I catch movement in the river across the way. I woke up this morning and watched the roomturn from gray to gold, and it felt like I was exactly where I’m meant to be. The sun still has some time to rise fully, but it’s light enough, and the river is low enough that I can see more slow movement along the banks. Two, maybe three, alligators, like the ones Birdie was talking about, are right there, minding their own business and enjoying the same morning I am.
Rumor is a long way from the Pacific Northwest, but this view feels right and more like home than the beach views from my place in Oregon. A home, not just a home base.
My phone buzzes on the counter as Wyn stirs in her bed.
I fire off a text message, confirming the plans I started to put into motion. I meant every word I said to her last night, and while I know that I’ll never stop missing my father, I woke up today feeling content about knowing what happened. I feel proud that he was exactly who I thought. That it wasn’t about the pieces of him I didn’t know, but that when it mattered, he was exactly the man who raised me.
