ELEVEN
8thNovember 1811
Longbourn
Elizabeth
Mr. Collins arrived at precisely five minutes before two o'clock. The punctuality surprised no one. Indeed, Kitty and Lydia had made a wager that he would arrive at least a minute later than his letter had promised, and both were disappointed.
His satisfaction in his own punctuality was evident from the moment he stepped down from the hired carriage. He straightened his coat and turned towards Longbourn with a smile so carefully arranged that it appeared to have been prepared in advance.
He was tall, broad-shouldered, and somewhere in his middle twenties. Elizabeth noted these facts and moved on immediately to the more pressing observation that he had not ceased speaking since his feet touched the ground.
Mr. Bennet performed the introductions. Mr. Collins bowed to each lady in turn. When he reached Jane, he paused a fraction longer than propriety strictly required and spoke of the pleasure of the acquaintance with particular emphasis. He lingered again when introduced to Elizabeth, displaying much the same degree of attention. Elizabeth returned his greeting with composure and resolved to think nothing of it.
They went inside.
An hour later she had entirely revised that resolution.
In the space of sixty minutes, Mr. Collins had expressed opinions upon the entrance hall, the drawing room, the prospect from the east window, the arrangement of the furniture, the selection of books upon the side table, the proper conduct of a parish, the relative merits of a country living compared to a town one, and the importance of humility in a clergyman, a subject upon which he discoursed at considerable length and with no apparent sense of irony.
What struck Elizabeth most was that scarcely an opinion seemed entirely his own. Every observation eventually circled back to Lady Catherine de Bourgh. What Lady Catherine preferred. What Lady Catherine recommended. What Lady Catherine had once remarked upon a similar subject. It was as though the lady's judgement informed every conclusion he reached.
Elizabeth could not recall disliking a man's opinions so thoroughly or so quickly.
Lydia and Kitty spent much of the time exchanging faces whenever Mr. Collins launched into another speech, though he appeared entirely unaware of their efforts. Even Mary, upon whom the family occasionally cast speculative glances, remembering her unfortunate defence of clergymen at breakfast several days before, did not seem especially impressed by him.
Elizabeth was still arriving at this conclusion when the sound of horses upon the drive reached her.
Relief, she hoped.
She was at the window before she had quite decided to move and was immensely gratified to discover that Mr. Darcy and Georgiana had kept their promise to call at Longbourn.
The new visitors were shortly shown in by Hill. Mrs. Bennet rose at once to receive them. Georgiana was welcomed warmly and with genuine pleasure. Mr. Darcy received a degree ofcivility that Elizabeth thought had improved considerably since his first appearance at Longbourn.
Mr. Bennet welcomed Georgiana with equal warmth. Elizabeth was delighted by it, for she had spoken of their friendship to him since returning from Netherfield.
After the usual greetings had been exchanged, and with Mr. Collins visibly disconcerted that the attention of the room had shifted from him scarcely an hour after his arrival, Mr. Bennet turned towards his guest.
"Mr. Collins, allow me to present Mr. Darcy of Pemberley and Miss Darcy."
For a moment Mr. Collins merely stared.
Then understanding dawned.
"Darcy?" he repeated. "Mr. Darcy of Pemberley?"
"Yes," Darcy replied.
Mr. Collins's eyes widened visibly.
"Good heavens." He bowed at once. "Then you are Lady Catherine de Bourgh's nephew."
"I am."
The effect upon Mr. Collins was immediate and profound.
Elizabeth watched it happen.
