His emotions felt warm yet sad at the same time. A lot of love was there, but the sting of grief and regret hungheavyover it.
“If I had gotten the chance to get to know my extended family—thefaewho raised and loved my own parents—I’dhave done so in a heartbeat. Because I imagine it would be like getting to know my parents all over again.” His lips tilted up intoa sad smile as I could see him imagining that exact scenario. “Lovedoesn’talwayshave to hurt. If you have an opportunity here to learnthat,you should take it.”
I slowly let out a shaky breath.
“You might be right. Despite what Matea believes,it’sbeen a decade and a half since anybody has seen my mother.There’sno guaranteewe’llfind her among the others we rescue. This… could be my only chance.”
He nodded his agreement, and I could feel his pride in me.
“You know, I do have some time to spare before I have to go check on everybody over at the den this afternoon,” Byn said, slowly reaching an arm behind me and stroking the inside of my wing.
I bit my lip to stop the sound that tried to escape my lips, but Icouldn’tstop the way my toes curled at the contact.
A second later, his nose was gently nuzzling into the side of my neck, then his lips met the soft skin there, and I melted.
As we spent the rest of the late morning in each other’s company, we shared kisses, our skin met, and our emotions flowed freely between our bound souls.
Just as I was coming down from the high of being with Byn, Icouldn’thelp but think that despite not knowing whatI’dbeen getting myself into with our tattoos, our soulsdidn’tmeet by happenstance. Because being in my husband’s arms, our bodies and soulsboundas one? That was exactly where I was meant to be.
Chapter Twenty-Two
All too soon, the sun reached its peak in the sky, and Byn had to depart to carry on with his tasks for the day. He’d invited me, but I’d told him I had something else I needed to tend to before the dinner tonight with the Ashfords. He’d asked no questions, his trust in me apparent; he’d simply pressed his lips to mine in a loving, gentle kiss before walking back towards the main part of The Haven.
Sighing, I headed back inside, leaving the balcony, flowers, and sunlight behind me. Pausing, I looked at what had become of our space.
WhenI’dfirst arrived, right after our wedding ceremony,I’dentered to find that Byn had swapped everything he could to reflect that of the North and what I was used to. The bedspread, the curtains, even the hardware on the doors and on the wardrobes had been swapped from gold to silver.
Now, it was a mixture. Iwasn’tthe same terrified femaleI’dbeen that night. Byn and I had begun to grow together—and I could see that development in the different gold and silver, green and blue hues throughout our shared space.
Smiling at the realization, I headed toward the wardrobe. I shuffled through the clothing I had—an interesting combination ofmy older Northern attire and my newer Southern clothing. The difference was striking, but I found it fun to try to mix the two cultures when it came to clothing.
With what I wanted to wear already picked out in my mind, I shuffled through the different items of clothing until I found what I wanted and donned it all, one piece at a time.
For the base, Ipicked a soft blue dress, the hue light to match my left eye. It just barely brushed the floor as I walked, and the flowing sleeves rested just off my shoulders. On top of the dress, Ilaced up a brown under-bust corset—one that was made mostly of leather and had an elegant floral pattern lightly carved into it. Thanks to its flexible boning,I’dstill be comfortable throughoutthe remainder of theday. To match the corset, Islid on a pair of brown leather boots that wentalmost upto theknee, andwere only visible when seen through the slit in the bottom half of thedress.
Aside from that, Idecided to wear my silver circlet—something I was still trying to get accustomed to wearing casually—atop my braided half-up hairstyle. The crescent moons at each end near my temples faced each other, as though enjoying a conversation only they could hear. I wore the silver chain around my throat that my moon stones had once hung from—the chain now bare, but still lovely. I buckled on a belt that held a sheath for a single dagger. Thereweren’tenough places to hide my usual dozen in this sort of attire, and Ididn’timagineI’dneed them today, anyway.
Besides, I was becoming a weapon myself.
Into the sheath,I slid the dagger that Dimitri hadsupposedly foundin our mother’s things. I still questioned in the back of my mind just how my brother had found it, and what the second crest on it meant. I knew one side was engraved with the Ashford family insignia—butI’dnever discovered whose was on the other side.
Or what it meant.
And I imagined if anybody were to know more about Mother’s past,it’dbe theAshfords.
Pausing to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, a small smile found its way onto my lips. I had a glint in my eyes Ihadn’tpossesseda month ago.
As I ducked out of our chambers, I tucked the gloves with my moon and sun stones into the pockets of my dress.But as I walked,mysmile slowly fell as I thought about what I needed to do before dinner.
It was time to check in with Ezra—and tomake a decision.
We’dbeen back from our scouting trips for a couple of days at thispoint, but theThorntierroyal advisors were not happy with Byn for leaving them once again. Teagan staying behind while we went on our recent scouting missions had helped, but the advisors were very demanding. Soimmediatelyupon returning,we’dbeen thrust into meetings wherewe’dfilled them in—albeit vaguely—on whatwe’ddiscovered while away, and where we planned ongoing tonext.Teagan had attended these meetings, but we’d made an effort to pull her aside afterwards and fill her in fully with details we’d left out.With that keeping us busy—so busy that Ihadn’teven gotten to see Margo outside of brief meals—today had been our first day since our return thatwe’dhad to catch up on ourselves and our general tasks.
Now that I had a moment to breathe, I desperately wanted to check on Ezra. And provide him with what was being kept from him—if needbe.
The walk across The Haven was quieter than usual—as though everybody had settled down for lunch all at the same time—though Ididn’tmind it. It meant lessfaewould see where I was heading.
While Quinn used to stay on the top floor ofCairnyl’sbarracks, that now solely served as her office. She and Ezra had picked out their own quarters there within The Haven, just before the BattleofShadows, apparently. Iwasn’tsure where Ezra had stayed before that, but now they were situated near the library for him, but also down the hall from the closest exit to the barracks for Quinn.
