I’m on my back. He hovers over me, cupcake poised, only to drop it and kiss me. Mine falls to the floor. I gasp against his lips. The icing on his nose smears against mine as I taste the sweetness on his tongue.
“Sneaky,” I say as he pulls away. I ghost my finger along his cheek, removing more icing, and stick it in my mouth. “Sweet.”
“You picked out some good cupcakes, from what I can tell. Shame you can’t behave.”
“Oh my god, are you going to punish me?” I say it with a laugh, but something flickers in his eyes. “Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize.” He straightens, pulling me up with him. I pluck my cupcake from the ground. Luckily, it didn’t fall facedown, but I’m sure Lucy will enjoy the crumbs. “Hey, if that’s what you’re into, then I would happilypunishyou…I think I’m just in a birthday funk.”
Zander settles back into the corner of the couch, wiping the last of the icing from his face. I take the opportunity to go back to his kitchen and grab his present. He watches me silently from his spot. I leave space between us this time, but he tugs me right back to him.
“Is that…I don’t know. Is that a birthday thing? Did you not get gifts? Did they ignore you?”
He runs a hand over his face, then pinches the bridge of his nose. “It shouldn’t matter now, right? I’m old enough to know better and understand they weren’t capable of loving me.”
“But that doesn’t mean you just get over it.”
“No. It doesn’t. I was never made to feel like I was important. My birthday was just another day where I was alive and a nuisance. I wasn’t worth it, especially on the day that was mine.”
I blink away tears, catch the one that’s managed to escape. I kiss his cheek and he turns into me. He deepens the kiss, a hand coming to the back of my neck. I let him take what he needs, decide when to break apart, when he’s found enough comfort in my lips, in my touch, in our shared heartbreaks. The slow, sensual movements of his lips fill me with a deep soul ache, one that makes me certain it is my job to make him feel worth it for the rest of my life.
When he unglues himself from me, I get the sense it was too soon. His forehead rests against mine and our breathing twins.
“You’re worth it,” I whisper. “I promise, you are.”
“Thank you,” he breathes.
“And you’re stuck with me,” I say and shove his wrapped gift between us. “I made this for you.”
“This makes it seem like you did some sort of weird spell to bind us.”
“Believe it or not, witchery is not one of my whimsical hobbies.”
“But it could be.”
His fingers carefully slide through the wrapping paper and tape. He doesn’t rip it like I would. He unhooks the paper and folds it into a neat little pile. A generic brown box stares back at him, and he pulls at the thin red bow I used to tie it up.
Inside is a pair of socks, which, yes, is pretty generic as far as gifts go. But I made these. Over the last few weeks, I’ve been knitting a pair of black socks with multi-coloured polka-dots. I hadn’t figured out why until recently.
Zander only wears neutral colours, like he’s trying to blend into the background.
“Sunshine,” he mutters.
I exhale. He’s got it. I want to bring the colour back to his life and if it takes me one sock at a time, then I’ll do it.
“You’ve never been cherished before.” I cover his hand with mine. “Let me cherish you.”
Chapter Sixteen
Adelaide
Ididn’t intend to be Zander’s present when I arrived at his apartment, but I’m not mad about it.
Zander tosses the box with his brand new socks onto the coffee table and leans into me. His mouth finds mine, but it’s different this time. It’s messy and open-mouthed and hot. It sends need pooling in my lower belly, aching for him to deepen the kiss, run his hands all over my body, leave me in ecstasy.
I grab hold of the collar of his shirt, attempting to pull him closer to me even though we’re already on top of each other. He cradles the back of my head, finds the elastic keeping my bun together, and tugs. Waves of hair fall over my shoulders. Zander breaks from the kiss, fans out my hair, and smiles.
“God, Addie,” he says, slightly breathless. “You’re beautiful. You’re incredible. You’re—”
