Killian follows me shortly after, and we lie here, both struggling for breath.
As much as the sex part is fantastic, I equally like this. Being in his arms, feeling as though nothing can harm me when I’m like this.
He pushes my hair back and I lift my chin to look at him. “That was pretty fantastic.”
“I agree.”
I grin. “Are you still mad at me?”
“For what?”
“The bachelorette party.”
He chuckles softly. “No, angel. I’m not mad. I don’t like it, but I understand the business side of it, and you’re right. It’s money and I can’t be picky.”
I raise one brow. “So you’ll do kids’ birthday parties?”
“Not a fucking chance.”
I laugh and kiss him softly. “Fine, I won’t push on that.”
“I appreciate it.” I start to roll to the left, but he stops me. “I’m not ready to let you go.”
My heart inflates so large I fear it might burst. He’s so sweet on top of being bossy. Each layer of Killian is a mystery. He’s smart, funny, caring, dominant, but willing to give in, and I know there’s so much more to uncover.
But at what cost?
Sure, there could be something terrible under there that will, once again, prove that men leave. He might have some deep, dark secret that could ruin my life. But, on the other hand, he might just turn out to be the best man in the world. I’ve seen that tender side of him, the one that makes me food, that ensured I had a place to sleep, even when he knew it would make things difficult for us both. If my instincts are correct, and all I’ll unmask is a wonderful man I can’t have, why do it?
There’s no reason other than to make me feel even worse about myself than I already do.
No.
I’ll keep my mouth shut about all my feelings and my heart locked firmly against opening up.
As if sensing the direction of my thoughts, he runs his finger down the slope of my nose. “What’s going on inside that beautiful mind of yours?”
I should be as honest with him as he’s promised to be with me. To tell him that I’m building a small wall around my very fragile heart so he can’t touch it, but that sounds ridiculous, so I won’t be doing that.
Instead, I latch on to the thought that there actually is something actionable I need to do. “I’m thinking that as much as I enjoy lying on your very sculpted and perfect body, I need to get dressed and go check on the bachelorette party. Gary is due back in about an hour, and the girls wanted to have their party items all ready to go when they returned from the ride.”
He sighs heavily. “And you’re the host?”
“Well, I didn’t think you were going to want to do it.”
“You think right since I had no intention of starting a new company, let alone one that caters to girls gone wild.”
“Buck wild—get it right,” I correct him. The low growl from his chest should be a warning, but I don’t heed it. “Now, I’ll go handle the party and you go do whatever it is you need to do to prepare for the auction this week. When we’re done, I get to pick the movie and maybe we can get frisky before it’s done.”
“Then by all means…”
Killian allows me to roll off him, and I saunter into the bathroom to get dressed. Right before I get to the door I turn back and smile when I see him watching me.
Yeah, I’m definitely going to start building that wall…
sixteen
Killian
