She laughs. “Something like that.”
I’m going to pretend that’s a yes. “Why does it take you a long time?”
“You don’t really need to be bothered by my baggage.”
She doesn’t get it. “Tessa,” I say her name softly. “You’re not bothering me. You’re not boring me. You’re not irritating me by telling me about who you are. I want to know everything that makes you who you are.”
Her eyes swim with emotion and she sighs. “Killian.”
“I’m serious. Why does it take you a long time to open up?”
I sit and wait while she worries her lower lip before finally explaining. “My dad…he walked out, which you know, every girl seems to have daddy issues, but he would come back when it was convenient for him. Never when I needed him. My brother, he cut him off long before I did, but I held out hope.” She laughs softly, but it lacks all humor. “There was a daddy-daughter dance that he promised he’d come to and then just never showed up. I was in my dress, sitting on the steps outside, telling my mother she was wrong and he’d come. I was so sure that there was a reason. He told me later that week he got busy and forgot.”
“Tessa,” I say her name, wanting to ease her hurt. “He should’ve been there.”
She shrugs. “It doesn’t matter. It was like that until I was about eighteen and I decided that I didn’t want to be an afterthought after my father told me that’s all I was ever going to be. He didn’t say it in those words, but he may as well have. Ihaven’t heard from him since I told him how I felt. He didn’t care and still doesn’t.”
My stomach churns as I think about what she must’ve felt. To be ready, eager to have something special and then be told she wasn’t worth it.
I’d like to punch her father in the fucking face for it.
“You’re not an afterthought, Tessa. Not ever,” I say, holding her chin so she can see the sincerity on my face.
Her blue eyes shimmer with unshed tears. “Don’t make me cry.”
I grin and kiss her gently. “All right, well, to answer what I think was your point, we’re not defined. You live in New York and I’m in Boston or here. Whenever we’re together whether it’s with work or in bed, just know that I will never lie to you. I’ll be honest if I can or can’t give you something. I won’t lead you on or make you think there’s more if there can’t be. Does that work for you?”
Honesty is the one thing I will always offer her. She won’t have to wonder where we stand or what we are, I’ll be transparent with her always.
“I’ll give you the same,” she says with a smile.
“Good. For now, this is amazing sex and fun when we’re not working. We can hang out, go out, whatever we want. At least now we can stop resisting.” I kiss her nose.
“Oh, you think we’re going to do this again?”
Her saucy tone already has me hard. “I do.”
“And why is that?” She asks.
“I’ll show you why.”
I roll us until I’m on top of her, my cock already hard and wanting to push inside of her. To feel the warmth of her around me, her heat, her scent, her taste, I crave it all.
Her legs automatically fall open, and I adjust so I can rub my dick against her. I rock slowly. “Tell me why I wouldn’t think that,” I demand.
Her perfect lips part and she gasps. “I don’t know.”
“No?” I rock again, making sure I rub her clit a little harder. “You’re already wet aren’t you?”
“Yes,” she confesses.
Not that I needed her to confirm what I already feel. “And could I push inside of you if I wanted?”
I don’t have a condom on so I only do the tip, just enough to let her feel me, to know I’m right there.
“Oh, please, fill me,” Tessa begs. “Please fuck me.”
“No, angel, I think you only get this right now.” Keeping myself from plunging into her is the most difficult thing I’ve ever done. “Just this, until tonight, when I know all day you’ve wished for my cock. You’ll have to look at me, think of me, imagine this.” I push just a little deeper, despite myself. “How much do you think you’re going to want me tonight, Tessa?”
