“I’m going back home in a few days.”
She jerks her head back. “Why?”
Because I can’t be close to him and not have him. And I can’t have him until you decide.
I look away from her so she doesn’t see the agony I’m in at the idea of leaving “It’s…I can’t be here.”
“But you love this place and you should be right here.” She pauses for a moment. “You should be with Killian.”
“What?” I ask, not sure I heard her right.
Meredith gives me a smile and pats my arm. “I’ve had the last few days to really see things for what they are. When I asked for some time after you told me about you and Killian, I pretty much already knew how I felt, I just wanted to be sure I didn’t jump the gun and then let you be hurt later on. My opinion doesn’t matter because your happiness is all I care about, but knowing you, you probably were waiting for it. I want you to be with the person you love, no matter who that is.”
“You’re sure? You mean that? You’re okay with me and your…father?”
“I’m sure. Here’s the thing, while Killian may be my biological father, I don’t really know him. He’s tried to be there, have a friendship of sorts, but I couldn’t do it. I felt like I was betraying my dad. Killian is not him, you know? My dadis the guy who taught me to drive, took me fishing, sat at my graduations, changed my diapers, raised me since the moment he found out about me.” Meredith runs her hand through her hair, which she does when she’s nervous. “Killian is…a guy who I found online who’s technically my biological father. You didn’t do anything wrong and you definitely didn’t know who he was, just like he would have no idea who you are to me.”
I blink. “What are you saying? Spell it out completely. No room for interpretation.”
Her head falls back, and she laughs at the sky. “I’m saying you should date Killian. I’m saying you and he should be happy. You should love him and he should get the privilege of loving you.”
“Meredith, I don’t want you to feel like you have to say this.”
She smiles at me and takes my hand. “You’re my best friend in the entire world, Tessa. I would never want you to be miserable. Look, I’m not saying this won’t be a little strange, but I would rather experience a little discomfort than watch you hurt. I see the way he looks at you, and it’s the same way Jake looks at me. All I’ve ever hoped for was that you’d find someone to love you that way. Every girl should know what that feels like, and I will be the absolute last person in the world to take that from you.”
For the first time in the last four days, there isn’t a boulder sitting on my chest.
She seems…okay with it.
Genuinely.
“You’re sure?” I ask again, not allowing my hope to build into something I won’t be able to control.
“Absolutely. Now go get your man.”
thirty-one
Killian
Iwalk out to the barn, looking for the girls, and I see Tessa wiping at her eyes. Meredith is doing the same when they spot me.
“Hey,” Tessa says, sniffling a little. “We were just coming to find you.”
“You were?”
Meredith comes to me first. “Yeah, I wanted to tell you what I just told her.”
“What did you tell her?” I ask, curious about what the hell has them in tears.
“I was saying how happy it makes me to know Tessa’s found someone who sees how special she is. She deserves to have a man who truly cherishes her and will do whatever he can to make her happy.”
I’m hopeful this means that Meredith is giving us her blessing.
Because I’m that man.
I know how amazing she is.
“I think she deserves more than that,” I say.
