I could still feel his hands on them, dry from washing over and over at work, rough, buthis. I loved the way they’d felt on my bare skin.
I wasn’t sure I could give him up after the weekend. I knew I had to, that I was only getting what I wanted now because, like he said, what happened here stayed here.
I took a bite of the croissant he’d handed me, humming in pleasant surprise as I discovered it was filled with pistachio cream. Thank you Dubai for bringing pistachios into fashion. I loved them.
Simon knew that. Of course he did. He was still taking care of me.
“This’s good,” I said, licking flakes off my fingers. I was going to end up covered in them, but I knew Simon wouldn’t care. He’d seen me at my worst and he was still here, letting me use him as a piece of furniture, tracing idle patterns over my hipbone.
“Figured you’d like it.” Simon pressed another kiss to the top of my head.
“Almost worth getting out of bed for,” I said, letting my eyes fall closed again. Exhausted as I was, I didn’t want to waste any of the precious handful of hours I had left of this. If I’d thought Simon would go for it, I would’ve blown off the wedding and shut us both away in my room until it was time to leave.
Of course, the wedding was theexcusefor all this, so I couldn’t actually do that.
What I was starting to secretly hope Icoulddo was show Simon just how good I could be to him. Good enough to convince him that things didn’t have to end when we got home. That if I was with him, I could be perfect, because I wanted so badly to be.
He knew me better than that. He’d been right to push me away ten years ago, and it felt like a miracle he hadn’t done it again.
If I had any sense, I’d take what was on offer and not wish for more. That way lay heartbreak.
Unfortunately, I wanted more. I’d always wanted too much from every partner I’d ever had.
I couldn’t risk asking for more from Simon. I needed him. However much of him he’d let me have. If that was being his best friend, I was the luckiest man in the world. It was too greedy to ask for anything else.
“You’re quiet,” he murmured, lips so close to my ear that his breath tickled. “I haven’t got a penny on me, but I could owe you.”
“Nothing important,” I lied. I was having some of what were probably the most important thoughts I’d ever had. They were just also the one kind of thoughts I couldn’t share with the person I shared everything else with. “Mostly that I bet Delilah’s complaining to everyone about us. They’ll all know by noon.”
“Well,” Simon murmured, nuzzling behind my ear. A shiver rolled down my spine and curled up in the pit of my stomach, pinching uncomfortably there. This wastoogood. It was obvious it couldn’t really last.
No matter how much I wanted it to.
“They do already think we’re dating,” he continued.
Think.
“Goooood morning!”
I jumped at the sound of a familiar voice, a spike of anxiety rising all the way up my throat.
“Good morning, Corey,” Simon responded, barely holding back a sigh. His hand moved from my hip to loop around my waist. Protective.
“Beautiful day,” he said, throwing his arms wide and looking up toward the miles of cloudless blue sky. Much as I would’ve liked to argue with him for the hell of it, itwasa beautiful day.
“For the summer,” I said, feeling just secure enough in Simon’s hold to poke the bear.
If he’d been planning on telling Simon the truth about why we’d broken up, he would’ve done it by now. If he’d done it, there was no way Simon wouldn’t have reacted.
So I wasprobablysafe. I figured it wasn’t something he wanted known any more than I did.
I still didn’t love the idea of him hanging out with Simon alone, though.
Corey laughed. “You haven’t changed,” he said, giving Simon a slightlytooclose look for my tastes. “Much, anyway. Sorry to break up this adorable scene, but I need to borrow your boyfriend.”
Boyfriend.
The word made something twist in my gut, a combination of pleasure and anxiety so tangled up together it made me feel a little sick. We’d been pretending all weekend, but I couldn’t remember anyone calling Simon that before now.
