Then I heard about thenextperson he’d fallen desperately, instantly in love with, and it was all over.
Corey had been different.
“I…” I began, searching for a way to deny that without outright lying. I never lied to Theo.
Theo was in the habit of falling not only fast, buthard. His exes had all been glamorous—models, actors clearly going places, human rights lawyers,Médecins Sans Frontièresvolunteers, clean energy entrepreneurs, and so on. All of them beautiful, all of them impressive. Not that they were out of his league,or anything—Theo was beautiful and impressive, too, and his family name opened doors like a social skeleton key. The Hargraves were old,oldNew York money, the kind of people you’d read about in a Wharton novel orThe Great Gatsby, right down to the actual mansion on Long Island. Montauk, specifically.
So his problem wasn’t that he aimed too high. Theo’s problem was that once he’d fallen in love at first sight, as usual, he’d bend over backward to please whoever it was. When it turned out he couldn’t be the perfect boyfriend he’d started out as forever because he was also a human being with needs, it all came crashing down.
Corey had different. Sure, he was an underwear model. But he’d been the first person I’d ever known to date Theo who actually seemed tolikehim. Maybe not as much as I did, but then he hadn’t known him nearly a decade, like I had when they met. I’d been expecting an engagement announcement to come anytime, and dreading it.
Then it was all over. Like an atom bomb making a direct hit in the middle of the bustling population center that was both of our lives.
I’d been scared, for a few weeks. Scared that Theo had been so badly hurt I might lose him completely.
He’d recovered, mostly, but he hadn’t dated since. That had been over a year ago. His previous record for being single in all the time I’d known him had been maybe three weeks.
“You were right,” Theo said with a soul-deep sigh. “You’re always right.”
Only because Theo’s taste in romantic partners was awful.
I loved Theo. So, so much.
“I’m not,” I said. I’d been right so far, but I wouldn’t always be. One day, he’d meet someone who was ready for him.
Someone other than me.
Theo made a tiny, unhappy sound.
“Okay.” I sighed. “Climb under the covers. I need all the beauty sleep I can get.”
Theo snorted. Even if it was at my expense, I took it as a good sign.
“Thank you for not agreeing out loud.” I smiled wryly.
“I should never have moved out,” Theo responded, shuffling under the comforter. “Anytime anything goes wrong, I come running to you.”
“That’s why you have a key,” I said. “And it’s what friends are for.”
“Don’t deserve you,” Theo mumbled, wriggling closer. I rolled over so he could take up his favorite position, curled around me with his nose poking my shoulder. Theo was all long limbs and sharp angles, but I’d always been soft enough to cushion him. I figured that was why he treated me like a giant, self-warming teddy bear.
“You do,” I murmured back, letting my eyes fall closed as my insides ached with tenderness.
Much as I didn’t like the thought of Theo being upset, I loved that he came to me for comfort. I never wanted that to stop.
“I don’t,” he insisted. “You’re too nice to me.”
I huffed. “You don’t want me to make pancakes in the morning, then?”
A heartbeat of silence passed, then another.
“Chocolate chip?” Theo asked.
My lips twitched into a smile. “Doublechocolate chip. I’ve still got some of that fancy cocoa powder Mom gave me for Christmas.”
Theo hummed, the sound vibrating through the thin fabric of the worn-out t-shirt I’d worn to bed. His fingers curled into the fabric at my waist.
Yeah. I never, ever wanted moments like these to stop. Even at the cost of being woken up at three in the morning.
