"Cass… if I tell you his name." I can't continue. I have never broken a confidence in Raleigh. Never.
She takes my phone from my hands, not in anger, but concern and calls Ral. "Hi its, Cass. I need your last name for the ticket."
Silence then she looks at me with curiosity, the worried kind.
"I know she does, but I am buying."
Silence again, then I can see that determined streak and its alarming.
"Ral, did you ever hear why I can't have kids?"
Silence then, "My ex butchered me hip to hip left me bleeding to die. I crawled five feet three inches to the phone and saved myself, much like I am guessing you’ve done. Now, that was like taking a bullet and it tasted like vinegar to admit to someone I don't know very well. Now, what is your last name?"
"Fairchild. Got it. Love you to the moon and back and I cross my heart and hope to die, lips are sealed, all that mumbo jumbo, pinky promise, love you, bye."
She types his last name in not looking at me. "So he is the lost Fairchild kid?"
I nod, unable to comprehend what I just witnessed.
She looks at me then. "People are assholes, the Fairchilds played it up three years ago like he was so against Gods plan and such an abomination. I don't think like them, none of us do." She looks back to her phone. "It is a well guarded secret I would never give away."
"Thank you Cass." I say softly and she looks at me with a smile.
"They are awful, and missing out on a fabulous loving son. Fuck them, like my sweet Ella, some people can't see the glory in front of their face. Their loss, our gain. Feel me?" She asks sounding just like Noah, I can't help but smile.
"Yes, I do." I say and hug her.
I get up to start for bed when she stops me. "You know, Carrie, Chad, Cal, Tay, Me and even Shame never thought we would find what we found. Cal, Chad and T and even myself had it pretty normal growing up. I lost my parents and my little brother in an accident when I was a kid, but never dealt with the bad until I was an adult." She looks at me pointedly.
"You and Noah blame yourselves for deaths you couldn’t have caused. You were both in dangerous places, but he rolled to save Cans, and you never would have been there if you thought she would be in danger. Accidents happen, but so do bad things that we have no control over. I blamed myself, sometimes I still do, for staying with Cory for even a day, but nobody can judge you, and baby you judgeyoutoo fiercely."
I look at her, unsure what to say when she smiles. "Go to bed gorgeous we have an early day. Just try to remember what I said okay?"
"Love you Cass." I say and go hug her.
"You too woman!" She says and smacks my ass.
***
Bright
By the time we left to get to the show, Raleigh was ready to go on a tear of Noah. Thank God Cassa had her way of calming him.
"He thinks he is saving her Ral. He doesn’t know how to move forward."
"Cass…" I ask and look at her as she drives. "Think he will ever get over her? Be able to move forward in time?"
She bites her lip and looks at me, fighting to not tell me something that she shouldn’t, meaning I should definitely know. "Tell me Cass."
"Ugh, fine! Please don't use this as a weapon though because he is already mad at me for yesterday."
"What happened yesterday?" Raleigh asks and he is just as interested as me.
"So when he played Fallen, it wasn't written for Cans. He wrote it for you. He was gonna tell you too, last night but shit went south in a fucked up way and fast. Tays been on him so hard and the pressure from the label and us even." She looks at me to gage my reaction, I nod for her to continue.
"After the epic blow up, Noah went to her grave."
She pulls into the venue and turns her attention to me…and Ral who is between the seats, practically panting for the story.
