“Boone, huh?” Dan said and rubbed his bearded jaw. “I just can’t see it.”
“Well, if the first date works out, there’ll be another date. Then, you can see us standing next to each other. Soon, we might make more sense to you.”
Dan grinned. “Okay, but don’t suffer in silence. If he bugs you, tell me.”
“No, I’ll tell Lula. Or Ivy. Or Elle. Basically, I’ll tell a friend. I’m not running to my big brother to help me with dating.”
Dan stared at me, unsure if he should leave. Lula finally stopped hiding in her office and lured him out of the house. Once I heard their SUV pull away, I sat out back and watched Ramen and Xena sniff the yard.
Despite the weirdness of the day, I felt calm. Boone was interested. I wasn’t tangled up in these feelings alone.
After the dogs were done with their business, I returned to the house and locked everything. The girls were already sound asleep when I tiptoed past them to the bathroom.
Stripping down to take a shower, I paused in front of the mirror and examined a body that I hadn’t paid much attention to in years.
My second stepfather hadn’t wanted me to be sexy. He was weird about it, and I soaked in his puritan thinking until I felt ashamed of my body. With Chris, I was pregnant so quickly that I didn’t worry about my weight or sexiness. I barely had a chance to recover from Skylar’s birth before I was pregnant with Lyric. By then, I had given up on wanting to look beautiful for my husband. He would climb on me whether I looked good or not.
Now, though, with my attraction to Boone, I found myself worrying about my physical appearance again. Having embraced the “mom look,” I kept my breasts well covered and never wore tight jeans.
Elle dressed the same way. She was always in jeans or sweatpants. She hadn’t done anything to attract Zodiac. Even now that she was in the last trimester of her pregnancy, she never worried about feeling sexy. She was just Elle. If people didn’t like that, she refused to give a crap.
I ran my hands across my belly. I had lost some weight over the last few months from walking around the community. But after two babies, my stomach would never be tight and smooth again. My thighs were toned from all the walking, but my butt still felt too round.
I wasn’t sure who I was comparing myself to. Lula had a natural sexiness and confidence about her. Ivy was so petite and brightly blonde that she looked like a doll.
My thoughts returned to Boone’s sister, Goldie. I once heard her say she liked having extra junk in her trunk because it made her ass more comfortable to sit on. I decided I ought to also enjoy my extra padding.
During my shower, I imagined what clothes to wear on my date with Boone. I could hide a lot of my “problems” with the right clothes. But hopefully, he would one day see me naked.Would I still feel sassy about my butt size and loose belly once I was stripped bare?
I crawled into bed next to the girls and turned off the TV. Sleep didn’t come for hours. I kept replaying my day, each time changing how I reacted. By the time I fell asleep, I had reached my optimum coolness in dealing with Boone. Too bad this awesome version of me only existed in my head after many hours of consideration.
The next morning, after dropping Skylar off at kindergarten, Lyric and I went to the park and stopped by the store. My second born had never gotten much alone time with me. As much as I missed Skylar, I enjoyed spending mornings and early afternoons with Lyric.
Dan texted me all morning, overly worried about a non-issue like my dating life. I eventually had Lyric respond with silly gifs until he stopped focusing on me and enjoyed his time with Lula.
After picking up Skylar, we enjoyed the mild day out in the yard with the dogs. Xena fussed a lot over missing Lula and Dillon. When she saw Dillon in Pax’s yard, the little dog danced around until I handed her over.
Dillon smiled at the Chihuahua. “I’m having fun with Grandpa and Grandma,” she told the dog. “You can hang out here with me.”
With Xena gone, Ramen got extra attention from the girls. Though I had planned to adopt a scarier dog from the shelter, the girls went nuts for the spaniel mix. As usual, I’d struggled to tell them no.
With us outside, I didn’t hear the knocking at the door until Pax called over to say someone was at our house. His tone made me think he was playing a trick.
I walked to the front door and peered through the side window. My heart leapt at the sight of Boone looking so sexy in a black T-shirt and faded blue jeans. His shaggy brown hair wasn’t as windblown as normal, and I realized he had driven over in a truck instead of on his motorcycle.
“How do I look?” I asked the girls as I began panicking.
“Like a princess,” Skylar said and shoved her face against the side window. “It’s that man.”
“His name is Boone. He rides in Lula’s motorcycle club.”
“Boo?” Lyric asked and shoved her face against the other side window. “He’s the boogeyman?”
Knowing she was messing with me, I ran to the bathroom to check my teeth and hair. Once I rushed back, I found the girls waving at him.
“He has flowers,” Skylar said. “It’s Valentine’s Day.”
“No,” I mumbled and finally opened the door.
