“I am sorry, Lana. I really do hope we can put this behind us and be friends. I think you’ll find I’m a pretty good person to have on your side.”
“I’d like that.” She smiles again, this time the action lighting up her entire face.
I’m starting to see what Mac saw in her.
“I’ll see you later.”
“Yeah, see ya.”
I pull the door closed behind me, feeling optimistic that we can turn our rough start around and, at the very least, tolerate each other this year.
I make a mental note to text Char later and thank her. She was able to get further in five minutes than I was in three days.
I don’t have to question how lucky I am to have her and Lyric in my life. I already know how extremely blessed I am. Between them, my family, and soccer, I have a lot going for me. And yet, even with that, I still can’t deny how incredibly unhappy I am.
I can’t explain it, or even truly begin to understand it myself, but it’s always there. This nagging feeling that tells me I don’t deserve any of it. Maybe because deep down, I know I don’t.
