Or on the floor… or whatever surface wasavailable.
Naked and all over eachother.
Then Maggie would flip her bitch switch and freeze me outagain.
It was like she was two different people. A woman who wanted me so bad she couldn’t resist me… sometimes. And a woman who wanted nothing to do with me, other than our workingrelationship.
Because anything more than a working relationship was a slippery-ass slope to sextown.
We both knewit.
I loved the fact. Maggiedidn’t.
And whenever our working relationship forced us together with other people around, like Brody or anyone in the band, she was all charm, overly-fucking-friendly.
Fake-friendly.
That was what really scared me. How fake-friendly she could be in front of everyone else, then totally ice meout.
I’d always thought I was trying to convince Maggie that we could work. That I was trying to charm her or seduce her or just plain persuade her into feeling something more for me than she did. Or, best case, that I was trying to uncover some deeper feelings she might have for me, that I hoped like hell she had, when I didn’t really know if shedid.
And I thought I wasfailing.
Epically, and over andover.
For a while, during a particularly long cold spell, I thought it was really over betweenus.
And I didn’t take it sowell.
I made somemistakes.
Not Dallas mistakes, but othermistakes.
And as usual, Maggie wasn’t so quick to forgive orforget.
But then Dirty reunited with Seth, and things seemed to turn a corner—for everyone. We were all pretty damn happy, and Maggie seemed to cheer the fuck up abit.
She was happy about the band being whole again, about the album, about the upcoming tour; we all were. Maybe she was just caught up in her work and distracted enough to forget how pissed at me shewas.
For whatever reason, my charms seemed to be working on her again. I knew we were really on an upswing when she started laughing at my jokes. She even came out on the town a few times with me and the boys, after I’d moved up to Vancouver. She wore sexy shit and semi-flirted with me. Or at least she didn’t immediately shoot me down when I flirted withher.
Progress.
I’d been texting her, calling her, turning up the heat at every opportunity; Maggie didn’t give memany.
But then one night… the night of Jessa’s baby shower, I’d somehow managed to convince Maggie to come over and see me. At myplace.
Alone.
You know, just totalk.
And we had talked. About the newalbum.
And aboutus.
About how she could never seem to trust me, which was fucked up (mywords).
About how I didn’t deserve her trust (herwords).
