When I discovered she was fucking a biker—some kid with the Sinners MC, of all fucking bikers—I couldn’t let my morbid curiosity about it go. Morbid, because hearing about a woman you wanted to fuck fucking someone else could only inspire fantasies of that dude’s untimelydeath.
Which meant that in order to avoid resorting to murder, I’d become mildly obsessed with waiting for her to ditch his ass. As if when that happened, I could finally let the obsession go. Because the obsession wasn’t about her,right?
It was about the fact that she was sleeping with the fuckingenemy.
And then that night. The night I received a distress call from Jesse’s sister, Jessa—from a fucking Sinners party. I’d immediately called Brody and my brother and flew there on my bike. I knew Roni would be in the middle ofit.
I did not expect to find her in the middle of a fucking three-way with Taze and anotherSinner.
The door was open on the bedroom where it was happening, and I’d walked right in. I’d just stood there staring for a long, long moment, trying to absorb what I was looking at, not really believing my owneyes…
This is what itis.
This is whatsheis.
… And not really wanting to believe myself. Even though Iknew.
I’d alwaysknown.
I stared at her until she suddenly met my eyes. Then she shoved both guys—who hadn’t even noticed my presence—off of her, grabbed her clothes and stalked right past me, out of theroom.
After she left, Taze got in my face a bit. He had no idea who I was other than some dude with a Kings cut on my back; no idea I was in that room because of Roni. But when he realized the Vice President of the West Coast Kings—my brother—was there with me and we were making nice—we were outnumbered fucking ten-to-one, so not much choice on that—he backeddown.
I didn’t back down. Not withRoni.
I found her in the backyard, where she was smoking up with some chick, and dragged her aside. I asked her what the fuck she was doing. And I warned her about theSinners.
I explained to her, very calmly, that there were good men who became bikers, bad men who became bikers, and seriously bad men who became bikers. In my experience, men recruited to the Sinners MC fell somewhere in the realm of seriously fuckingbad.
She laughed in myface.
And I tried not to be so bothered byit.
I already knew shit about her new boyfriend she would not want to know, no matter how tough she thought she was—offering herself up for gang bangs and all—but I wouldn’t go there. Judging from the attitude she was giving me, she probably wouldn’t have believed a word I had to say about Tazeanyway.
But I was bothered as fuck by what I’d just seen, the world she was dabbling in, the risks she was taking. And byher—acting like she didn’t give a shit what I thought about any ofit.
I told myself to put her out of my mind rightthen.
Just forget abouther.
Not so easy todo.
A few nights later I saw her again, at a Dirty show at the Back Door. I couldn’t even tell if she saw me, but she definitely avoided me like fuck. I had no idea if she was pissed at me or totally over me—if she’d been over me for years and I was fucking kidding myself there was anything left between us tosalvage.
If she still wanted me or hatedme.
If she just didn’t give adamn.
I kept telling myself to leave it alone, to stay away. Just like I did back then, all those yearsago.
And just like I did, all over again, when I saw her exactly six days ago at Brody and Jessa’s meet-the-baby party—and she brought fucking Taze withher.
It. Pissed. Me.Off.
She basically told me to go fuck myself when I warned her, again, what a piece of shit her boyfriendwas.
But even while she did that, I was sucked the hell in by my attraction to her.Again.
