* * *
In the end,I didn’t wake him. I just sat next to him until he stirred and, maybe sensing that I was awake, he wokeup.
He sat up, slowly, blinking in the dull morning light. It was still early, the sun not quite over the horizon; the house wouldn’t have full sun until almost mid-day. I usually loved mornings in this house. Sleepy, slow mornings in the shadow of the mountains, where I could be alone to drink coffee and play my bass or listen tomusic.
And it struck me; I’d never had a man in this bed before. I’d only bought this house earlier this year, and I’d never brought Ashhere.
It felt extra-intimate, sitting here now, with Seth. I had the sheet pulled up around my chest, but he was uncovered. And the first thing he did was lean over, slowly, slip one hand around the back of my head… and kissme.
I sighed, giving in to it. I dropped the sheet. Heat rose through me fast, an instinctual response, as my body remembered the things we’d done last night. And I felt the same inexplicable, irresistible connection I’d feltthen.
When he broke the kiss, his eyes held mine, awake and smoldering with desire. “Do you want me inside you?” he murmured. And I realized I was clutching onto his shoulders, my fingers digging into hismuscles.
“Yes.”
He pulled the sheet away, until there was nothing between us. He moved over me as I lay back to take him. Then he rammed inside. I met him with fast, frantic thrusts. We were already fucking before we’d barely gotten into a comfortable position. All I wanted was that connection—hot and fast, that maddening friction, his body possessingmine…
He stiffened, and before I knew what was happening, he pulledout.
“What…?” Ipanted.
“Condom.Shit.Condom,” he panted back. His eyes were huge. “Sorry… I can’t believe I fucking didthat.”
Yeah. I couldn’teither.
I was a little more concerned, though, that I hadn’t evennoticedhe’d started fucking me without acondom.
“Get one,” I said, gesturing at the bedside table, where we’d left the box from lastnight.
He leaned in to kiss me, gently, on the mouth. Then he rolled over, got the condom, and rolled it on. When he came back to me, his eyes were still wide. He looked totally freakedout.
“Fuck. I’m sorry,Elle.”
His eyes on mine, so dark and regretful, so full of longing… it felt like he was apologizing for a hell of a lot more than thecondom.
“It’s okay,Seth.”
We kind of fell into one another then, kissing and comforting each other. He stroked my hair back from my face as he kissed me. I slipped a hand around his neck and pulled him closer. We pressed together until we were dry-humping and then my legs were wrapped around his waist. Then he was sinking into me, and fire swept through my entirebeing.
And I felt it, as we cametogether…
Both of us…achingforconnection.
For redemption, of asort.
We’d both suffered massive rejection. We’d been heartbroken, in our own way. And as we lost ourselves in each other—on the bed, on the edge of the bed, and finally, on the floor—as the day gradually grew brighter… it was cathartic. It was beyondintense.
It felt like he was slowly stripping me down, laying bare all my shattered pieces, flooding my heart with a dangerous longing… thrusting heat and light into all my lonely, brokenplaces.
As Seth fucked me on the furry rug by my bed, his hand braced against the bed frame so he wouldn’t ram me right into it, his smoky eyes locked on mine… I came, hard.Sohard.
It was, hands-down, the most intense orgasm I’d ever had. It wasn’t just physical; it was pure emotionalecstasy.
Every part of me was tuned into him, intothis.
Because Seth was showing me how to feelwholeagain.
He was teaching me, with his kisses, with his hands on my body, with the patient insistence of his thrusts, how to put the pieces back together. How to feel good again, from the inside out. Not good the way I’d felt when I slept with Ash; an empty kind of good. This good was all-consuming, and with our bodies entwined, it was a oneness I’d never felt before. A oneness I’d never expected to feel withhim.
