And wondering how we’dgottenhere.
Lasagna. I’d been makinglasagna.
Then Roni came home and turned my night inside out with herWhich one of you are you trying to bullshit anyway?Because that’s what a wildcarddid.
For once, I’d have to thank herforit.
“Sweetheart…? Are youcrying?”
“No,” I sniffled, realizing I was. “Shit. I’msorry.”
“Babe. What’s wrong? You okay?” His voice had softened and filled withworry.
I took a few shaky breaths, my mind gone all to mush in the wake of that last orgasm. But one thought stood out, prickling at me likeaburr.
“Why did you go to Chicago,Brody?”
“I told you, sweetheart.Mymom.”
“Yeah. But… you were getting away from me, right? You wanted togetaway.”
There was some rustling around as he changed position. “Babe. I had some shit to take care of. That’s all. Don’t read anything into it. I’ll be back tomorrownight,okay?”
“Okay.”
“You good with what wejustdid?”
“Yeah. Yeah,I’mgood.”
I was. It was atotalrush.
A rush that had let loose a whole flood of shit I didn’t even know how to process. A whole flood of shit that was sweeping over me now, threatening to take meunder.
“I just… I wish I could hold you now,” Iwhispered.
Brody swore under his breath. “We shouldn’t have done that over the phone. What the fuck was Ithinking.”
“No… seriously. It’s okay. It was good. Great. I just… Imissyou.”
I did. I so fuckingmissedhim.
Not just today, or the lastfewdays.
I’d been missing Brody my whole fucking life, and these few moments of intimacy we’d just shared, over a phone, had brought that tolight.
I wanted him home. In myarms.Now.
He was silent a longmoment.
Then he sighed and said, “I miss you too, Jessa,” his voice rough withemotion.
This.
This was exactly what would’ve happened if I’d ever texted him back, if I’d ever returned any of his calls over the years. We would’ve ended up righthere… only without all the wasted yearsbetweenus.
I cried harder, cradling the phone, trying to hold my sobs in so Brody wouldn’t hear. I just sobbed and sobbed as I listened to his voice, muffled, fromfaraway.
Jessa?
