Then it was Devi’s turn. I clung to her as she hugged me, feeling safe in the arms of the person who knew me better than anyone on the planet. When we came apart, she looked me in the eye, strong and steady, and told me the truth.
“It’s time to move forward, sweetie.”
◊◊◊
After I let Becca and Devi out, I locked the door and walked around the room.
It really was the perfect space for an art studio. I could imagine all my supplies organized into the shelves along the walls. There was enough room for several easels, and to store all my work, and then some.
Hell, I could do art showshere.
I went upstairs, emerging from the spiral staircase into the partial loft that overlooked the studio below. Jesse was there, standing in front of the paneled windows that merged with the skylight above, fiddling with his phone. Two things struck me at once: the fact that he’d probably heard every word that had been spoken below, and the view.
“If you want to be independent, Katie, you need to have something to build your dream on,” he said, stashing away his phone. “Something that’s your own. This is yours. No strings attached.”
“It’s just that I had that before,” I said, moving closer to him. “IthoughtI had that before, but there were strings. I just didn’t see them until it was too late.”
“No strings,” he said. “I’ll sell the property to you, dirt cheap. Whatever it takes so you can make it your own. You have mad talent, and it kills me to think you don’t know it.”
I didn’t know what to say. “I mean… I think my work can be better. But that’s the thing about art. It grows and evolves.” I was growing, too. I had a lot of ideas for the work I wanted to do. “And I’m so out of practice… but I’ve kind of been dying to get back into it.”
And with a place to do it, and funds to support me while I worked… it really was my dream come true.
“Don’t you have a show to get to?” I asked as he came closer.
“I’ll get there,” he said, unconcerned. “And if this doesn’t work for you, we can do it any other way.”
We? I looked up at him and took a deep breath.
“It works,” I said.
He nodded and rubbed the back of his neck. “And you know, with the money you just made on the tour, you can make a go of this. With or without me.” He looked at me and I knew he was waiting for me to say something.
He was giving me a chance to take the money, and now the studio, and run.
As if I could ever do that.
“I’ll do the contract work for Dirty. But I can’t take that other money, Jesse. I’m giving it back.”
“It’s yours. You earned it.”
“While I was having sex with you. It just feels…”
“Dirty?” His mouth curled in a small grin.
“Yeah.”
“Katie, I didn’t pay you to have sex with me.”
“I know, but—”
“I didn’t pay you to love me, either.”
I stared at him, at the plain truth there on his face, wanting to refute it.
I couldn’t.
“Jessa told me what you did. What you said to her in L.A..” He stepped closer, until all I could see was him. I looked up at his face. He was searching my eyes. “Why did you go see her?”
