Heavy talked her through it until her breaths stopped sounding like she was drowning. Until her body softened in his arms and her sobs turned into quiet cries.
Heavy wiped beneath her eyes with his thumbs. “Better?”
Cyren shook her head as her face crumbled. “She was my best friend,” she whispered.
The words hit Heavy so hard, his jaw tightened. His stomach flipped, knowing the one person who was supposed to be there, talking shit about his emotional ass in the bathroom, wasn’t. Heavy swallowed hard and pushed the grief back where it had been sitting all day. Cyren kept talking.
“She was all I had for a really long time,” she cried. “Even when I got older, it was still her. Every good thing that happened in my life, I called her first. Every bad thing, too.”
Heavy listened, swallowing down the knot of emotions in his throat.
“She was supposed to be here,” Cyren’s voice cracked. “She was supposed to meet my kids one day. She was supposed to complain about me working too much and how we needed to add another stamp to our passports. She was supposed to be here for all the regular things, and she’s just…” She broke off, shaking her head. “Gone.”
Heavy closed his eyes, briefly. Cyren’s tears had mentally and physically disturbed him, but her words almost made him break down right along with her.
“I hate this feeling. No one knows what I’m going through. It’s like... how does life still go on? Why? Some days, I don’t want to be here. Not like harm myself or anything, but just away. Somewhere far where no one knows me, and I don’t have to wear my grief like some fucking badge of protection or an introduction. That’s not who I am. That’s not who I want to be.”
Heavy didn’t know what to say right away. The bathroom grew quiet again, except for their uneven breathing and the bass from the music upstairs floating through the walls. This wasn’t the first time tonight that Cyren had struck him speechless, but it was the most conflicted he felt.She confiding in a nigga, and I ain’t got shit to give her but words I need to use myself.Heavy’s thoughts took over before he broke the silence.
“I know this shit is wearing you down, but it gets better. You gotta believe that.”
“You can make me feel better.”
Heavy stilled. “What?”
Her fingers curled into the front of his wet shirt, and Cyren held his gaze. “Please.”
She knew he knew what she was asking for. His eyes searched hers for uncertainty, but all he found was pain and tequila-fueled honesty.
“Cyren…”
“I don’t want to feel like this right now,” she whispered. “Please make me feel something else.”
Heavy’s jaw flexed as he looked away, fighting a battle she couldn’t fully see. He hadn’t come down there for this. Whatever the fuck she was trying to makethisbe. Cyren moved closer, wrapping her arms around his waist.
“You’re hurting too,” she whispered. “I can feel it.”
Heavy’s breathing turned shallow.
“You keep trying to save everybody else from feeling what you feel. Who saves you?”
That question nearly unraveled him. He didn’t have an answer for her but possibly a solution. For both of them. His hand stroked the side of her face, and he restrained himself from gripping her neck like he wanted to.
“You don’t know what you asking me for.”
“Then show me. Do whatever you gotta do, so I can’t feel that shit.” She used his words from earlier against him. Unfair, but all was fair in the game of healing.
“You sure?” Heavy needed one hundred percent consent.
Cyren nodded. “I may be grieving, but this pussy isn’t.”
He would’ve laughed had this been another time when her pussy wasn’t calling his name to be devoured. Before he changed his mind, Cyren decided to let him know just how sure she was. Her lips found his, and Heavy didn’t hesitate to kiss her back. Flipping his hat to the back, he slid his tongue into her mouth and let her suck on it while his hands gripped her ass. With an urgency to erase the pain she was feeling, he swooped her up in his arms, carrying her to the counter.
His strength shouldn’t have surprised her, but it did. Cyren wasn’t some young girl with no meat on her bones. Her weight, or whatever the fuck she was concerned about, wasn’t any of his business. Only making her feel better was. Their heavy breaths echoed throughout the bathroom as he unbuckled and slid her shorts down, tossing them on the ground. He pulled her to the edge of the sink.
“You smell so fucking good,” he expressed in a pleased grumble against her neck before kissing her there. He had wanted to sniff her all night like a dog wanting to learn about their owner’s day.
Cyren’s head fell back as he licked from one side to the front of her neck, unbuttoning her top so he could kiss down her chest. She grinded into him, silently begging him for more. Heavy smacked her ass and lifted her feet onto the granite. Spread openfor him, Cyren held her breath as he placed the juiciest kisses against her damp panties. Her gasp encouraged him.
