Erica gave in. Just for a moment. She wanted to find one particular picture of her mom when she was a teenager that she liked. Maybe she could take it somewhere and have it enlarged to hang in one of the rooms on the second floor.
With all the impartiality she could muster, Erica sat down in front of the box and pulled out the albums. She flipped through the pages. Her eyes skimmed the photos, looking for the right one, but all the objectivity in the world couldn’t keep her stomach from fluttering when she saw the first few pictures of Cole standing with her mom.
Steeling herself again, she put one album aside after another, looking for that picture she remembered. When she finally found it, the one of her mother in a sparkling blue prom dress with puffy sleeves that came off her shoulders, Erica peeled back the thin plastic sheath. Careful not to damage the old photo, she pulled it off the black backing.
Her mother was stunning with her light brown hair done up in a curly perm, eyes bright and cheerful, and with the white corsage on her wrist. Erica tenderly stroked the edges of the photo as a slight smile found its way to her lips. Another month had passed, and the loss wasn’t any easier to bear, but these pictures eased the pain somehow.
Before she stacked the albums back inside the box where she never had to see them again, Erica caught a glimpseof something white at the very bottom among the other paraphernalia. An envelope, a little faded with age, was stuffed beneath all the albums. Her name was scrawled across the top in her mother’s handwriting.
Erica greedily reached for the envelope and stared at the face of it. The handwriting always conjured up memories of little notes her mother stuck in her school lunchbox. Simple things likeI love you, have a great dayandI’m so glad you’re my daughter. If they had a fight the night before, her mother used these notes to apologize in some way or another. If she wanted to make plans after school, she’d tell Erica about it this way so she’d jump out of her seat to hurry home after the dismissal bell rang.
By the bulkiness of this envelope, her mother had one last thing to say to her that couldn’t be crammed on a sticky note.
Unsure whether it was wise or not, Erica tore open the envelope and read.
Sweetheart,
I’m writing this while you’re in the backyard taking pictures of the flowers. You were always the creative one. I want to say you got it from me, but that would be a lie. If you’re reading this, you must have opened the box of things that belonged to me and your dad before he left. I hope wherever you are in life, you’re in a place where you can forgive your dad for not being here. I’m not going to waste this letter trying to convince you to forgive him. I want you to forgive me.
I lied. I told you that your dad abandoned us, but it was a mutual decision. There are many things in this world that I hope you never come to understand, but I do want you to know one thing. I loved your dad. If I’m honest with myself, I’d say that I still do. He is the best, most honorable man I know. Life has a funny wayof bringing people together who should have never been together in the first place, and that’s what happened with your dad and me. There are things about him that made our marriage difficult. He was dedicated to his job, and years later, I understand why. I don’t have many regrets in life, but I do regret taking you away from your dad, or at least not allowing him to visit when he wanted.
What’s done is done, and we can’t change the past. I might be rambling, but I need you to know that for better or for worse, you are a gift. A treasure. Never think that our separation had anything to do with you. It happened during a time when everything wasn’t going well for your dad, and I was too young and blind to see that it was possible for a man to love two things at once. His family and his job. He was so good at his job, but all I saw was my own pain and how he wasn’t there when he said he would be. I was selfish and stubborn. I threw away a good man, and I’m writing this letter because I don’t want you to do the same. You take after me in so many ways, but I don’t want you to follow in my footsteps.
If you find love, which I hope you do when the time is right, I hope you hold on to him with both hands and don’t let go. Don’t let your pride force him away. You’re already showing signs that you’re going to be just as independent as me, but don’t let that get in the way of letting someone in. I chose this life. I made the decision not to rely on any man because I was afraid of being hurt again, like your dad hurt me. But that doesn’t have to be the way you live. Learn to trust, learn to open up, and let someone open the door for you once in a while. No one needs to walk this life alone.
So, forgive me for being a terrible role model. Forgive me for making a decision that changed our lives withoutany consideration for you or your upbringing. If I could have gone back and done things over, I would have tried to work things out between your dad and me.
I know you’re going to grow up into a strong, confident, talented woman. You’re only ten right now, but I can already see so much of your dad in you. Just learn when to hold your ground and when to let things go.
If you have the chance, if you want to see your father, his name is Cole Spradley. He’s a sheriff in Tolstone, and I’m sure everyone knows him. If you don’t want to see him, I understand, but at least consider it. He wants to know you so badly. He always hoped you’d grow up to be beautiful and smart, and I want him to know that you are and so much more. He loves you so much, Erica. And I hope you can learn to love him too.
Love you to the moon and back,
Mom
The bottom was signed withX’sandO’s, the way they used to finish off each of their letters to one another, but Erica could barely see them through the tears. She had expected something like a farewell letter, or something to echo what she thought her mom believed of Cole from the start. She expected hateful words about how he abandoned them and threw away his family. She didn’t expect an apology.
She rubbed her knuckles into her eyes to wipe away the tears, but the damage had been done. Now she knew that her mom never held a grudge against Cole. She regretted everything. If only they could turn back time and do things over, like the letter said. Then again, if they did, she might never have met Dominic, and then she’d never be able to follow one of her mom’s last requests.
Epilogue
Hank and Gagewere already upstairs with Ronan while Dominic stood behind his new glass display case and register counter. His previous one had been completely smashed when Wyatt threw him into it the night they fought. His healing had taken care of the deep gashes from the glass shards, but he wished he could have simply replaced the panes in the metal frame instead of buying a new case. This one was far too wide, but it allowed for deeper shelving inside to display more wares.
The people of Tolstone, shifters and humans, rallied behind Dominic’s efforts to bulk up his inventory again. Donations came in every day from attics and old storage units. He had a few auctions already listed on his calendar and a massive estate sale out of town in the coming month that would boost his stock, and he was grateful for the overwhelming support he’d received.
If only this damn insurance business could be taken care of. He had moved all the forms and inventory lists from his office to the front counter moments ago, so that way he would be near the front when Erica arrived with the food. He didn’t condone eating in his shop, but he figured now would be the perfect time to introduce her to the upstairs apartment, if she was comfortable being around so many alphas and betas.
Thankfully, while he got a handle on all this shit, Hank and Cole stepped up to compensate for his absence in pack affairs. Something in what he said to them the night after the fight with Wyatt must have stuck in their minds. He finally put his foot down about needing the pack to distinguish what was a problem they could handle themselves, what was a job for a beta,and what was his responsibility as Prime Alpha. He didn’t need another pack coming into Tolstone that would tie him up the way Wyatt’s had. They had to share the load somehow.
His father ran this town differently, but they were due for a change in policy. That’s what they would discuss during this alpha meeting. All they needed was Cole and Shane, who were to arrive any minute.
The front door opened, and by the pull of his mating bond and smell of greasy burgers and fries, he knew it was Erica without looking. Yet, it wasn’t the food that caught his attention. The residual scent of tears is what made him drop his pen and move around the counter to her.
Erica’s beautiful hazel eyes weren’t rimmed in red, and her nose wasn’t puffy, so it must have been a good while since she’d cried.
“Are you all right?” he asked after taking the plastic takeout bags from her.
“Uh, yeah.” Erica replied in that way she always did when she thought he was acting a bit strange. That look came up less and less as she was introduced to more of the shifter culture, and she understood his methods and reasons more fully.
